


The Destruction of Grimmauld Place

by showmeyourtardis



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Gen, Get together fic, M/M, MWPP, Marauders' Era, Mutual Pining, Pining, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-25
Updated: 2015-10-05
Packaged: 2018-03-19 14:45:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 39,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3613833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/showmeyourtardis/pseuds/showmeyourtardis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sirius's family are going on a trip to Salazar Slytherin's hometown. Of course, Sirius, as a blood traitor and Gryffindor, isn't invited. He doesn't mind so much though, as this year, he's hosting the Marauder's yearly Summer Camping Trip. It's time for Sirius to break out the firewhiskey and trash his childhood home.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. There's No Place Like Home

**Sirius**

 

Sirius heard the tell-tale sound of suitcase wheels on the landing. He leapt off his bed, almost launching the two-way mirror across the room. Ignoring Prongs's indignant yelling coming from the glass, Sirius scrambled towards his door. He pressed his ear to the wood, and heard footsteps. He couldn't tell whose footsteps and he decided to risk a glance out. He readied his wand, just in case it was his lovely mother in the corridor.

The door creaked open, and Regulus faced Sirius. He arched one eyebrows and Sirius frowned at him, “I thought I smelt something rotten.”

“I'm not the rotten one here.” Regulus drawled, in that classic Black manner. All of them did it. All of them spoke lazily, dragging each word out, like everything in the world was boring to them, like it was tiring just to speak. Except Sirius, who spoke with such animated enthusiasm, it seemed to physically hurt his family to listen to him.

Which it likely did.

“If a tree has only ever created bad apples, when a good apple comes along, it can be a little confusing.” Sirius smiled, leaning against the door jamb. His black hair brushed against his neck as he watched his little brother.

Regulus was a lot like Sirius, which they both detested. They looked alike, so much so, that they could be twins. Except Regulus never smiled, his face was stuck in a perpetual state of disdain and boredom. Much like their mother. Sirius's hair was longer and softer, and his shoulders were broader. Still, though, they both had the model good looks and marble grey eyes that ran in their family.

“Clever. Did your muggle friends teach you that?” Regulus asked, clenching his fist on his suitcase handle so tightly, his knuckles were turning white.

“They did actually. Right before we all had dirty, muggle sex-” 

“Regulus! Hurry up!” Sirius's mother screeched from downstairs, interrupting Sirius.

Regulus almost jumped three feet in the air, as he hurried to please their mother. Sirius rolled his eyes as Regulus ran down the stairs, dragging his suitcase behind him, and returned to his room. He found Prongs in the two-way mirror, still ranting on about being rudely abandoned.

“It's great staring at your ceiling when I'm in the middle of talking-”

Sirius interrupted him, “I gotta go. I'll mirror you when you can come over.”

“Sirius Black, you-”

Sirius tucked the mirror back into it's hiding spot – under his pillow – muffling James's complaints. He yanked the leather jacket off his desk chair and threw it on, looking at himself in the mirror. He was wearing typical muggle clothing. Black jeans, an off-white tee, and his leather jacket. The only thing that wasn't a muggle item was the small dragon tooth necklace around his neck, given to him by Remus last Christmas.

No one in his family would be caught dead in this outfit. Sirius grinned as he left the room, there was nothing like giving his family a proper farewell.

He roughed a hand through his hair as he jogged down the stairs. He followed the sound of voices towards the lounge. He took a deep breath, and steeled himself, before stepping inside. Nine pairs of haughty eyes turned to glare at him. Despite the anxiety that had clogged his chest, Sirius smiled easily.

With forced enthusiasm, he asked, “Is everyone ready to go?”

“You're not coming!” His mother hissed, looking at her disappointment of a son. She looked thoroughly humiliated. As though the other people in this room hadn't been aware of his existence until now.

Of course, that wasn't true. These were the people who were present at every one of his birthday's until he had been sorted into Gryffindor, when they'd all collectively disowned him.

Sirius looked at the people in the room. His mother and father, Walburga and Orion, were stood closest to him. They both looked embarrassed and furious. His father had a restraining hand on Walburga's wand arm, probably stopping her from murdering Sirius right here.

He had been told to stay in his room until they were gone. Which, normally, he would love to do – his room was his only haven in the hell-hole. But he knew how much his presence would piss off his parents, and that was worth whatever curses they could throw at him.

Next to them, stood his Aunt Druella and her devil-spawn Narcissa and Bellatrix. They were both younger than him, yet they looked at him like he was a rebellious child, and they his hardworn parents. Druella lacked the token raven black hair, not being a Black herself, and Narcissa had inherited the white blond. It stood out starkly against her sister's, which was ratty and pitch black. Sirius looked at them with disgust.

Regulus stood in between his paternal grandfather, Arcturus, and his maternal grandmother, Irma. Sirius nodded at them both, but neither acknowledged his presence. They were both too busy fawning over Regulus, they hadn't stopped talking to him about his time at Hogwarts, even when Sirius had walked in. Regulus had stopped replying to them though, preferring to stare at Sirius with everyone else.

Oh, and Kreacher was there. But he wasn't worth mentioning, as he clung pathetically to the hem of Walburga's dress.

“Oh please, Mother.” Sirius begged, putting on those puppy-dog eyes he did so well, “Please let me come to your pureblooded, snake loving, muggle hunting trip. I _so_ want to be there.” He dissolved into laughter. No one laughed with him.

“Why do you keep that blood traitor in this house?” Bellatrix asked, her childish voice rang through the room.

She was maybe seven or eight, Sirius guessed, and she was already so full of discrimination and hate. Sirius would mourn for her, if he didn't hate her so much.

“Because,” Druella said, acknowledging her child and completely ignoring Sirius's presence, “They cannot legally kick him out yet.”

“Yes. Don't worry Trixie darling, I'll be out of your rat's nest of a hair pretty soon.” Sirius smiled.

He dodged the curse that was sent his way by his father, and smiled back at him lovingly. He knew he should leave. He'd successfully mocked one of his relatives, embarrassed his parents, and even thwarted their attempts at harming him, he was three for three, and if he stayed any longer he'd start to lose.

He was enjoying the awkward silence he'd created though, he wanted to bask in it a little longer. He moved away from the door and walked further into the room, feeling nine pairs of eyes on him. It was a lot like walking into the lion's den, although in this case, it was more like a snake pit.

“Don't mind me.” Sirius voiced after no one had said anything for ten minutes. Even his grandparents had stopped fawning over Regulus, to watch him uneasily. They didn't like that he was here. None of them trusted him. Which was insane, because if anyone was in danger here, it was so clearly him.

Remus once said that Sirius had no sense of self-preservation, and this was just proof of that.

“Sirius, go back upstairs.” Orion ordered, his voice boomed like thunder in the silence, but Sirius barely flinched. Compared to his mother, his father was a harmless kitten. Sirius smiled to himself and spun to face his dad.

His dad towered over him, but Sirius still didn't back down. He looked up at his father, who also looked a lot like him. Sirius looked like a lot of the people in the room, and he hated it as much as they did. If he could dye his hair red and gold, he would. In fact, he'd have to find out how to do that.

With a smile that would infuriate everyone in the room, Sirius said, “Make. Me.”

His father looked taken aback briefly, until his face scrunched up in fury. He gritted his teeth and Sirius could practically see the fire starting in Orion's head, the steam was about to come out of his ears and Sirius couldn't wait. He would love every second of his father's explosion, because he had caused it. He would have made his usually calm and bored-looking father, lose his cool. Sirius waited eagerly.

Only, the explosion never came. Orion's anger fizzled out lamely, like a failing bomb. A calm mask fell over his face, and he stared blankly at Sirius, looking uninterested. Sirius narrowed his eyes.

No.

He would not lose this, not in front of everyone. His father would react, he would.

“Go.” Orion stated, no inflection in his voice whatsoever.

Sirius had lost. He realised with horror that he'd been outsmarted. His father knew Sirius wanted him to explode, and he'd refused. Sirius pursed his lips. There was a tangible shift around the room, as everyone else realised what had happened. Sirius felt uncomfortably hot, suddenly he wanted to leave the room. He wanted to be free of them, before they brought him down any further. He took a step away from his father.

The anxiety had flooded his chest again, and he found it much harder to breath. He shouldn't feel this way around his family, but he did. Any of them could attack him right now, what had he been thinking coming in here?

He could have been upstairs talking to James, or blasting muggle rock music to piss them all off. He could have been in safety, but no, he had to poke the bear. He had to be arrogant and spiteful. He had to sink to their level. He hated them all, they brought out the worst in him.

He looked at them all individually. Regulus and Bellatrix wore matching smirks. The adults looked at him exasperatedly, like he was a toddler throwing a tantrum and nothing more. He blinked once and pasted a smile on his face.

It felt fake, and they could probably tell it was, “As always it was lovely to see you. Please be careful when you curse innocent children and puppies this week, we wouldn't want any curses to backfire and make you all hideously grotesque, would we?”

Sirius spun around, his smile dropping from his face the moment they couldn't see. He reached for the door handle. The curse smacked into his back, launching him forward.

As his vision refocused, the floor materialised in front of his face. He didn't remember falling or landing. He wasn't in pain, if you didn't count his bruised ego. The laughter grew in volume as he lifted his head, and he realised what had happened.

His mother.

Of course it was her. Her laugher was the most prominent, and the curse had her signature all over it. There was no pain initially, it had been designed to knock him to the floor and humiliate him. The moment he started to get up though, the pain began. The moment he regained some sense of pride, the curse was designed to knock him back down again.

He wouldn't let it though. He'd fought worse than this, and she knew it, being the one who put him through it. Sirius used the wall to pull himself up, ignoring the laughter and focusing on his heartbeat. He was alive, no matter what the acid spreading through his veins tried to tell him.

He yanked the door open, hoping the pain in his body wasn't obvious with every agonising step. Razor wire was threaded through his every nerve. He held his head high and walked from the room, letting the door swing closed behind him.

As soon as he was away from them, he stumbled towards the stairs, staggering up them as his vision blurred in and out of focus. He almost tripped several times. He wanted to stop and collapse, to curl into a ball until the pain stopped, or he passed out. He had to get out of the corridor though, if he was here when they began to leave, he'd be inviting them to attack.

The walk to his door seemed to grow with every step. Had his door always been this far away?

At the top of the stairs, he pushed away from the bannister, and hit the wall with a thud, sending fresh slices of pain through his body. Ignoring the steady thumping of a headache growing at his temples, he slid across the wall shamefully. He didn't feel real, he felt like he was an intruder in his own body. He felt like he was made of fire and pain and loss.

He palmed open the door, just in time to hear the voices of his relatives as they filed towards the fireplace, in the second lounge. They were still laughing. He let himself drop to his knees now, and crawl into the room.

He stopped moving as the pain reached it's max, and lay face down on the floor. He thought of his friends, hoping they'd come round soon and find him.

 


	2. Letters to Prongs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James gets a lot of mail, grovels to his girlfriend, and breaks the law.

**James**

 

“I gotta go, I'll mirror you when you can come over.” Sirius said quickly.

“Sirius Black, you bastard!” James muttered as the image of Sirius disappeared, replaced by his own furious reflection. He held the mirror at arms length and ran his free hand through his hair, getting it to just the right level of I-don't-care-what-I-look-like mess, before placing it on his bedside table.

He swung his legs over the side of his bed, and stared out the window. The sun filtered through the glass, casting a square of golden light across the floor and his feet. To his right, at the end of the bed, sat two letters. One bore his name and address, in narrow, loopy script and green ink. The other had just his last name, written neatly, and slating slightly to the left.

Neither one particularly appealed to him.

Out in the garden, their gnome ran around the flower beds, digging up the bulbs. James gnawed on his lip. He knew he couldn't ignore the letters forever. Eventually, he would have to read those letters. But given his perpetual bad luck, both of them would bear bad news, and really, he didn't want any bad news.

He stood up and stuffed both pieces of parchment into his pocket. Leaving the two-way mirror behind – it was Sirius's turn to be ignored – he jogged down the stairs. He ducked his head into the kitchen and watched his mum mix something in a bowl, while the sponge cleaned dishes on it's own. He tiptoed over to her, hoping her humming would cover any sound he might make. When he was directly behind her, he threw his hand out towards the mixing bowl.

A wooden spoon caught his knuckles and he yelped, cradling his hand. She smiled and turned to face him – she must have expected him all along. The letters crinkled in his pockets as he lifted himself onto the counter. His mum returned to mixing, pretending to ignore his presence.

He kicked his heels into the cupboard door beneath him, and watched her. She started humming again, and a packet of chocolate chips opened itself and poured into the mixing bowl as she stirred. He blew air out between his teeth.

“Where's Lily?” She asked, her eyes flicking up to him briefly.

“We're having a fight.” He said, trying to sound casual. She didn't react how he'd expected. He had expected her to throw her hands out in despair and cry. Instead, a small smile tugged at the corner of her lips. He folded his arms across his chest indignantly, “It's not funny!”

“No, of course not.” She said, though she kept smiling. She placed the mixing bowl on the counter, and one hand on her hip. Her long black hair was tied into a bun, but a few strands had escaped around her face. She watched him, “What did you say?”

“Why do you assume I said something?” 

“Because I know you, James Potter, and much like your father, your mouth runs off before your mind can catch up. So spill, and get off my counter before I whack you again.” She ordered, waving her spoon menacingly.

He sighed and slid off the counter. He watched the clock tick it's way towards midday, wondering where exactly he should begin. He figured he should skip over the love letters, and jump straight to where it all went wrong.

Sighing again, he began to explain, “So we were sending letters, and I was telling her about you and dad, and she told me about her family. And she mentioned her sister.” 

Mrs. Potter hummed to show she was listening, and pulled her wand from her apron pocket. She aimed it at the mixing bowl and the cookie dough began to shape itself on the baking tray. James watched, still as amazed as he was when he'd first seen this, ten years ago.

“She said that Petunia – that's her sister – is a muggle, because you know Lily is the only wizard in her family.” His mum nodded and he ran a nervous hand through his hair, “So, this Petunia really hates Lily, because, I don't know, she's jealous? Or she's scared? She just doesn't understand, and she always calls Lily a freak.” 

“You were rude about her sister.” His mother concluded, correctly, arching one eyebrow. He nodded guiltily, feeling Lily's letter burning a hole through his pants. He should read it, but her response to him offending her sister was not going to be good. He so badly didn't want to read her angry words.

His mum sighed and looked thoughtful for a second. After a long pause, she said, “You are an idiot.”

“Thanks mum.”

“But I'm sure Lily knows this already. Read her letter, stop avoiding her, and go from there.”

“How do you know about the letter?” James asked suspiciously.

“You think you can hide things from me?” She laughed.

James pressed a kiss to her cheek, and walked into the garden. The gnome saw him and made a break for the neighbour's fence. James wasn't in the mood to chase it, so he let it go. Instead, he took a seat on the bench at the end of the garden, and pulled out his letters. He looked at the one from Lily, bearing only his surname.

Taking a deep breath, feeling the sun beat down on his shoulders, he ripped open the envelope and unfolded the parchment.

His eyes skimmed the page, and his shoulders fell. It was worse than he imagined. He was expecting a three foot long parchment about why he was a toe-rag, or an exact plan of her revenge. He had not expected this.

This was worse. This letter burned with fury. It was four words:

“ _Leave me alone, Potter.”_

It was final. It might as well have said, _you fucked up big time, pal._ He clenched the parchment in his fist, until it was crumpled into a ball. He stared at it, not entirely sure what to do now. He could send her a letter back, and do the opposite of what she'd asked him to do, but even he knew that wasn't a good idea.

He could do as she asked, and leave her alone, but he didn't want to do that either. He didn't know what to do. So, he threw the parchment ball across the yard, where it bounced in the grass a few times and came to a stop just before the newly dug up flower bed. There was no breeze to take it away, so it just stayed there. James watched it blankly.

Four words. Four tiny words that had such an impact on him.

He sighed and removed his glasses. He rubbed his eyes until lights danced across his eyelids. Well, he had already read one soul-crushing letter, he might as well go for the double gut-punch. He pulled out the other letter, written in green ink, and replaced his glasses. Ripping open the envelope revealed a longer letter, that looked rather formal.

It was bad news. It was so clearly bad news, that James lay down on the bench, hoping it might hurt less this way. He was going to be in so much trouble. He began to read,

“ _Dear Mister Potter,_

_Upon receiving your letter, I was once again astounded at your courage and selflessness in regards to your friends.”_

James sat up, a shiver of excitement ran through him. Maybe he was wrong, maybe it wasn't bad news...

“ _In sending me a letter that could have gotten you into a lot of trouble, you have proven that you will do anything for your friends. That, or detention isn't quite the punishment it used to be._

_Either way, this letter is here to inform you that I have a lot of pull over at the Ministry. I will not go into detail into how I did it, but I will say it involved a ten foot parchment about enforcing a new law on cauldron thickness, and a wizard's lack of concentration in regards to such a thrilling topic._

_To cut a story short – and avoid revealing any details that could drop us both into the cauldron fire – I will simply say this:_

_Yourself,_ **Mister James Potter** , _and your friends,_ **Mister Sirius Orion Black, Mister Remus John Lupin,** _and_ **Mister Peter Pettigrew** , _will be considered of age, for one week only. The trace will be removed as of midday on Sunday, and will be returned midday the following Saturday._

_It does not need to be said that this is highly illegal. I must warn you that during this week, you will be considered an adult wizard and therefore, able to use magic outside of Hogwarts._

_Now, I must repeat that, you and your friends will be able to use any spells this week – say, the_ Animagus Charm, _for example – but as your responsible headmaster, I must advise against ever using such spells, as they are dangerous. No circumstance could possibly permit the use of such spells by underage wizards._

_Have fun this summer, Mister Potter. I hope to see you and your friends on the 1 st of September looking bright eyed and bushy tailed – figuratively, of course._

_Yours most graciously,_

Albus Dumbledore”

James read the letter. Then he read it twice, three times, four times, five times, until he could quote the important parts word for word. No way was this happening, no way had his plan actually worked. He practically leapt from the bench and ran back to the house, right past Lily's letter without so much as a glance. He barrelled into the empty kitchen, his mother had disappeared, and he stared at the clock.

One minute to midday.

He ran upstairs, sounding like a herd of trolls, and threw open his bedroom door. He found his wand on his bedside table, and waited. He wasn't sure what he was waiting for. Maybe he'd feel the trace leave him. He didn't know. He counted to sixty, and then just to be sure, he counted to sixty again.

“Okay.” He said to himself. He aimed his wand at the two-way mirror, “Wingardium Leviosa.”

Glee threatened to break through his ribs as the mirror floated gently into the air. He waited, watching the mirror sway gently under the spell. Any second now, an owl would arrive with a letter from the Ministry, giving him his first warning. He counted to sixty again, let the mirror drift back to the table, and chucked his wand on the bed.

No owl had come! No owl had arrived! Which meant, oh Merlin, this meant so much!

He paced the room, grinning stupidly. He'd done it, he'd successfully taken the trace off them for a week, for the week of the full moon. For the first time since James, Sirius, and Peter had mastered the Animagus Charm, Remus didn't have to spend the summer's full moons alone! James wanted to jump for joy.

Then there was a tap at his window. He froze.

An owl sat on his windowsill. A posh looking owl, with haughty eyes. Reality came crashing down. Even Dumbledore didn't have the power to remove the trace from him, even for a week. Like a scolded child, James lifted up the window and the owl flew in, it's wing tips whipping against his cheek. It perched on the edge of his bed and dropped a letter.

James stared at it. Not another letter. How many letters was he going to get in one day?

He approached the bird cautiously, it was still watching him, judging him. He reached for the letter and the bird shot out, pecking his finger harshly. Blood bloomed on his skin and he glared at the bird, “Prick.” 

The bird didn't seem to mind being insulted, it spread it's wings, and took flight again. Leaving James alone with his bleeding finger and the ominous letter. James ripped open the envelope and unfolded the parchment with one hand, sticking his bleeding finger into his mouth.

He skimmed the letter, written in tiny, familiar script. A great weight left his shoulders and he started to relax, this was not from the Ministry. Maybe Dumbledore had done it. James didn't dwell on that just yet, he had a letter from Moony in his hands, which couldn't be good.

“ _Oh Noble One Named Prongs,”_ The letter read, and James let out a laugh,

“ _I can't come this week. It's the full moon, and you know what my mum's like. Plus, we're still underage so you guys can't become animals anyway. It's just not going to work._

_Have fun though, tell Padfoot I'm sorry, I can't get a letter to Grimmauld Place._

_~ Moony_

_P.S. If the owl bit you, I'm sorry, he's a tosser sometimes.”_

James rolled his eyes. He'd successfully broken the law, and even risked getting expelled, for Moony, and he wasn't coming? No way. James took the letter over to his desk and pulled out some parchment. He dipped his quill in the ink and began writing quickly,

“ _Dear Man of the Moon,_

_Can't explain why, but it will be okay. You need to come this week. Trust me._

_Prongs._

_P.S. You know Padfoot isn't going to let you back out.”_

He folded the letter and stuffed it into an envelope, which he addressed to Remus's house. Then while he was already at his desk, he pulled out another piece of parchment.

“ _Lily,_

_I'm such an idiot. You know this, I know this, even my mum knows this. If there's any chance you're reading this letter, and haven't just thrown it into the fire, I want to tell you I'm sorry. I have no right to speak of your sister in such a way, and if you want to turn all of my clothes to Slytherin colours, I accept your punishment._

_But please, don't stop speaking to me._

_I'll be at 12 Grimmauld Place for the rest of the week, your owl might not take letters there, I don't know why._

_If you decide to forgive me, we can use the floo network._

_James x”_

He folded that letter and put it in an envelope too. He addressed it, trying to disguise his handwriting as best as he could. Once both letters were complete, he waved his wand at his room, and the neat pile of clothes on his floor began to pack itself into his suitcase.

He could get used to this magic-at-home business.

With his suitcase packed, his wand behind his ear, and the letters held in one hand, he marched back down the stairs. He entered the lounge and placed his suitcase near the fireplace. His mother and father smiled at him when he walked in. He nodded to them, and faced the owl perched on the TV.

“Godric.” He said, the owl ruffled it's feathers. James held out both the letters, “This one is going to Lily, and this one is going to Remus, don't screw it up.”

The owl made an offended sound and James gave it the letters. Godric spread his wings and flew out the open window.

“Letters to Lily, ey?” His father asked.

“Just fixing my mess.” James replied, smiling at his parents, “I'm off to Sirius's.”

“Have fun.” His mother said, “Tell Sirius we said hi.”

“Don't break any laws.” His dad warned, and James just laughed quietly to himself. He grabbed a handful of floo powder and through it into the fire. This week was going to be the best week of summer, he just knew it.

“Twelve Grimmauld Place.” He said.

 


	3. Food Fight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius is reunited with his friends, and destroys his kitchen.

**Sirius**

 

When Sirius finally came back to the land of the living, he was delighted to see the worried faces of Prongs and Wormtail staring down at him. Sirius smiled, and squinted. It was dark in the room, the sunlight was no longer streaming in. He was sure he had been face down when he'd passed out, but now he was facing the ceiling. Prongs stood up when Sirius opened his eyes, letting out an audible sigh of relief, and offered his hand to him.

“Thanks.” Sirius muttered, as he was helped to his feet.

“What happened?” Wormtail asked, standing up too. He helped steady Sirius when he swayed.

“My mother.” Sirius mumbled, feeling a bit light-headed. He glanced at his bedroom window, behind Peter's head, and saw it was dark. Was it even the same day? He was disorientated and hunched over. He felt achy and old, “What time is it?”

James clucked his tongue, “About eight. You've been gone for hours.”

There was darkness in James's eyes, barely covered by his easy smile. Sirius didn't want his family to ruin this week before it had even began. He forced his face to contort into something that resembled a smile, but James's eyes didn't lighten. There was still a fury behind them.

“We brought food.” Peter offered helpfully.

Sirius placed a hand on James's shoulder to keep himself upright. He tilted his neck, listening to it crack loudly. He reached his other arm high into the air and stretched, a slight moan slipping from his mouth as the blood returned to his limbs. He felt like he'd been stuffed into a trunk for the entire day.

Once he was stretched, he lead them downstairs, past their suitcases parked in the hallway, and into the kitchen.

The pain from his mother's curse had disappeared completely, leaving him a bit dizzy but nothing more. It could have been much worse. Maybe she was softening towards him...

He reached for the Every Flavour Jellybean packet on the table and rooted through it. He found a pink one and chucked it into his mouth – rose flavoured – as Peter found a pumpkin pie. James sat down too, and reached for a bottle of pumpkin juice, still clearly seething from Sirius's treatment at the hands of his mother.

“When did you come round?” Sirius asked, hoping to distract James slightly. He ate another jellybean – a green one, flavoured like seaweed.

“I came around at twelve.” James shot a look at Peter, “And Wormtail, came around at thirty seconds past twelve.” 

“I'm sorry!” Peter squeaked.

“What happened?” Sirius asked, swigging some pumpkin juice to rid his mouth of the seaweed taste.

“Peter almost trampled me getting out of your fireplace is what happened!” James explained, and then Sirius saw the red mark on James's cheek. Probably where he'd been knocked down by Peter. Sirius smirked, as Peter began apologising a thousand times, to which James just glared.

After drinking the bottle of pumpkin juice, Sirius felt less like a reanimated corpse, and much more like a real person. It was weird to be in the kitchen without fear. Usually, he would just sneak food into his room, halfway through the night, to avoid eating with people who could – and likely would – poison him. But as he watched James and Peter stuff their faces, he felt a lot safer.

Sure, James had once spiked his pumpkin juice with a burping potion, but that had been revenge for Sirius telling Evans about James's dreams.

“Pass the sugar quills.” Sirius muffled through a mouthful of pumpkin pie, as he pulled out a chair and sat down. It made sense that he was hungry, having not eaten all day, and been passed out for most of it. With the spread of food across the table, his stomach didn't know what to crave first. So, it settled on wanting a piece of everything.

Jellybeans, pumpkin pie, cauldron cakes, sugar quills, sugar mice, chocolate frogs, chips, pumpkin juice, orange juice, apple juice, ham sandwiches, chicken sandwiches, the list went on. Sirius wondered where James and Peter had gotten all this food from.

“Sure.” James said, biting into a cauldron cake.

He pulled his wand down from behind his ear, and aimed it at the table. With a mumbled spell and a swish of his wand, the individual plates of food rose into the air. They weaved over and under each other, and settled back down again, in a completely new arrangement. The sugar quill plate nudged at Sirius's shoulder.

Sirius felt his mouth hanging open. He cast a quick glance to Peter, who looked just as confused as he felt, and then looked back at James. A knowing smile played on his lips, as he continued to eat.

Eventually, he swallowed and looked up. He had that look he had on his face he usually had after a particularly good prank, like he was proud, but also trying to play it cool. He looked between Sirius and Peter, “What?” 

Both Sirius and Peter started talking at the same time.

“How did you-” 

“-but the trace-”

“-aren't you worried about the Ministry-” 

“-you'll be expelled-”

“-that was so cool-” 

"-you're an idiot-”

James held up his hands to his adoring fans and stood up on the chair. Sirius rolled his eyes at his big-headed friend, but waited eagerly to hear this explanation. James's hair was it's usual mess, and he wore a grey t-shirt, sporting the Chudley Cannons logo.

Sirius knew even James wasn't dumb enough to break the law of underage magic. Was he?

James cleared his throat, “As you know, I'm the best. I sent a letter to Dumbledore about Moony, and Moony's condition affecting our yearly camping trip this year. He agreed to take the trace off us for a week.” 

“WHAT!” Sirius asked, leaping from his chair and sending it crashing to the ground. Was James saying what Sirius thought he was saying?

That they had magic. That they could use magic at home. Sirius could leave curses in his relatives bedrooms for when they came back? Oh, revenge would be sweet.

“I'm the best and we have magic.” James summarised, taking his seat again. Sirius practically tackled him with a hug. James laughed against him. After a few seconds of hugging, he shoved Sirius away, “Okay, get off me.”

“This is great. We have to set traps for my parents.” Sirius beamed, picking up his chair and sitting back down. He could picture it now, the entire house being stained red and gold. His parents's bed becoming a trap for them. Regulus's wardrobe cursed to chase him around the room.

Smiling dreamily, Sirius grabbed a sugar quill and licked it.

“We also have to do this.” James said.

In one swift motion, he leapt up and blasted the sugar quill out of Sirius's hands. Sirius leapt up too, throwing his chair to the ground once more and retorted with a pink spell that whizzed right over James's head. The spell exploded against a decorative plate on the wall, smashing it to pieces.

All three of them froze, looking at the plate in shock. Sirius was the first to recover, he sent the same pink spell towards the plate of pies in front of Peter. They exploded, sending pumpkin flying all over Peter's face.

He turned, red-faced, to Sirius, “You'll pay for that, Padfoot.”

Sirius lifted up his chair once more and used it as a shield. James had created his own hazy shield with the Protego charm, and Peter was ducking under the table. A red spell shook the chair protecting Sirius. He leaned around, and sent a blue spell flying towards James. It caught him on the shoulder and knocked in backwards.

There was another smash, as one of Peter's spells cracked another plate. As the shards flew across the floor, one stopped close to Sirius. He reached out for it and read the words,  _“the nobility of Slytherin”._ He cackled loudly.

He was too busy laughing to notice the purple, popping spell James sent towards him. It hit him in the ribs, and he began to laugh harder, almost choking. A tickling charm, of course. It was James's favourite.

Sirius's ribs tingled and he laughed uncontrollably, clutching at his stomach as it began to ache. He could hardly breathe as he writhed on the floor, all his breath was disappearing into laughter. He would have his revenge. He began to plot just how to get James back, as he laughed and laughed, and tears fell from his eyes. It was horrible, he hated it, yet he couldn't stop laughing. Coughing up laugh after laugh and struggling to control himself.

“I...” He choked out between laughs, feeling like he could almost breathe again, “I hate... I hate you, Prongs...”

Finally, after what felt like an eternity of laughter, Sirius managed to compose himself, and dragged himself off the floor. He sat down again, wiping the tears from his cheeks. James smirked at him, as he drank some apple juice. He nodded towards Wormtail, who was face down on the table, snoozing gently.

“Sleepers Charm?” Sirius asked, drinking straight from the orange juice carton. James nodded, and Sirius smiled, “Nice one.” 

James winked and levitated a ham sandwich over to Peter's head. He let it drop gently onto him, where it balanced just behind his ear. Sirius joined in, levitating a cauldron cake towards him.

Soon, they had piled a quarter of the food onto Peter, who had not even stirred. Snickering and stifling their laughter, James attempted to levitate the carton of orange juice onto Peter. It swayed slightly at the top of the pile, threatening to fall at any minute.

Sirius didn't mind that, when Peter woke up, there would be piles of food on the floor. He didn't care that their short duel had resulted in scorch marks across the kitchen walls, or the smashing of three decorative Slytherin plates. He didn't care. Because he had been cursed in front of his entire family, and they had laughed. So now he would laugh as Grimmauld Place was trashed.

Then something dawned on him. Prongs had won the duel.  _Prongs_ had won. Prongs never won. He was always beaten by The Marauders' very own Duelling Master, Remus Lupin.

“Where's Moony?” Sirius asked, dropping the sandwich from his hand.

“Oh, fuck, yeah.” James said, rooting through his pockets. He pulled out a piece of crumpled parchment and threw it at Sirius.

Sirius caught it and unravelled it. His eyes skimmed the short letter as he read Remus's tiny writing. When he was done, he shook his head and placed the letter on the table, “No.”

“I know.” James said, roughing a hand through his hair.

“No way is he backing out this year! Not the first year I can host it, no way.”

“That's what I told him.”

“Plus now we have magic because-”

“-I'm the best.” James suggested.

Sirius rolled his eyes, “Because you're the best, so we can become animagi anyway.”

Sirius stood up abruptly. He grabbed a cauldron cake for the road and turned to leave. James's voice stopped him, “You know where he lives, right?”

“Yeah. Don't wait up, honey.” Sirius winked, as the kitchen door swung shut behind him.

He found his broom parked in the hallway. Placing the cake into his mouth, he zipped up his jacket, and opened the front door. It was a warm, still night, and as he mounted his broom, his cheeks began to ache from smiling so hard. 


	4. Padfoot and Moony's Wild Ride

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus Lupin gets caught daydreaming, has a cute boy in his bedroom, and almost dies.

**Remus**

 

“Stop sulking, Remus.” Hope Lupin ordered, looking up from her knitting.

Remus snapped back to reality and looked at his mother. He felt heat rush up his neck, and pointed at his book, “It's actually called reading.”

Technically, what Remus was doing wasn't called reading, it was called daydreaming. He had been thinking about Grimmauld Place, and his friends, and how they'd probably already broken out the firewhiskey by now.

Okay, fine, that wasn't true either. He was thinking about Grimmauld Place, and firewhiskey, only James and Peter weren't there... and neither were Sirius's clothes.

“You were looking about a metre away from the book, Remus.” Hope said, the clicking of her knitting needles filled the room again.

“You know it's for the best, son.” His dad, John, said, looking up from The Daily Prophet.

Remus nodded, his mouth feeling unusually dry, as he thanked Merlin that his parents didn't know Legilimency. He returned his gaze to the book, but the words didn't hold any interest to him. He could be in Sirius's house right now - the infamous Grimmauld Place.

They'd all heard a great many things about Grimmauld Place – none of them good – and this was probably their only chance to see inside, and Remus was missing it. There would never be another chance to enter the hellish place Sirius called a home.

Especially for Remus because, not only was he a Gryffindor, he was a half-blood and a werewolf. Sirius's mum would probably go into cardiac arrest if she found out Remus's filthy presence had graced her hallways.

Although, Remus was sure that wasn't such a bad thing.

He knew he should be grateful to his parents. They were only looking out for him. The full moon was this Friday and if he went to Sirius's for the week, it would mean he'd be turning into The Wolf around his friends. What his parents didn't know, of course, was that this wouldn't be the first time, not by a long shot. They had no idea just how equipped those three were, when it came to dealing with The Wolf.

Remus sighed, and his mother shot him a look. He looked apologetically at her and wriggled in his chair to get comfy.

Just as he turned the page, to keep up the charade of his reading as he daydreamed about Sirius's bed, someone knocked on the door. Remus dog-eared the book page and left the lounge. Out in the hallway, during the short walk to the door, he was free to sigh as much as he wanted. So he did, letting out all the pent-up frustration he had at being housebound. He reached for the front door handle, but before he touched it, the door swung open.

Sirius stood on his doorstep, smiling smugly. Remus blinked a few times, half-convinced this was just some vivid hallucination. No one could look that good in a leather jacket, t-shirt, and jeans. It was not possible. The necklace Remus had given Sirius last Christmas hung from his neck, and his hair was pushed back beautifully. Remus drew his brows together in confusion, and Sirius's smile grew.

“Hey Moonbeam.” He grinned, leaning on the door jamb.

“Don't call me that.” Remus said instinctively. It was only Sirius who ever called him  _Moonbeam_ and he hated it. Remus threw a glance over his shoulder at the lounge door to check his parents weren't listening, and whispered, “What are you doing here?”

“Nice pyjamas.” Sirius grinned, his eyes trailing from Remus's bare feet upwards. Remus felt heat rush up his neck, instantly regretting his choice of attire – fuzzy pyjamas weren't exactly the sexiest outfit in the world – and repeated his question.

“I'm here to free my Princess.” Sirius whispered back.

“I told Prongs I couldn't go.” Remus said, ignoring the jab at him being a Princess.

“Yes, and I believe he told you that you're an idiot.”

“He didn't.”

“Well, he should have.” Sirius said, “There's no way you're missing the chance to see me be an excellent host.”

“But Sirius-”

“Remus? Who is it?” His mum voiced behind him. Remus let his eyes shut in defeat. He had lost now. If his parents ever met Sirius he'd be banned from hanging out with him. The boy who has a tendency to start fires, and has no sense of self-preservation at all, is not who you want your werewolf son hanging out with.

No matter how much your son wanted it.

“It's just Sirius, mum.” Remus said.

“ _Just_ Sirius? Ouch.” Sirius whispered as he stepped into the hall. He sidestepped Remus and headed for his mum, extending his hand, “Hi, Mrs. Lupin. I'm Sirius Black, we met last year at King's Cross.”

Remus took a few seconds to turn around, trying to contort his face to hide his obvious shock at Sirius's manners. There was no one Sirius spoke to like that. Not even McGonagall.

When he finally turned around, hoping his face hid his confusion, Sirius was shaking hands with his dad.

“Of course, nice to see you again.” His mum smiled down at Sirius, “But I'm afraid Remus can't go this week.”

“I know, I came to talk to you about it actually.” Sirius said.

“Sirius, we don't really think we'll be changing our mind.” John said, looking at Remus suspiciously. As though it had been his idea to bring Sirius in. Remus was smarter than that, if he wanted his parents to do something for him, he usually just pulled the werewolf card on them. The only reason he hadn't done it this time, was because it wouldn't help his cause at all.

Sirius's shoulder slumped, “Okay, I understand.”

He turned to leave, smirking slightly at Remus as he went. Remus wasn't sure what Sirius had expected to happen. His parents weren't going to be swayed by some charming teenager in a leather jacket.

Remus was about to open the door for Sirius to go, when Hope's voice stopped him, “Oh... well... you've come all this way. Why don't you at least have a cup of tea before you go back home.”

Sirius's grin threatened to split his face as he stopped walking towards the door, and eyed Remus triumphantly. Remus let the confusion show this time. Sirius quickly made himself look forlorn and sad, before following Remus's parents into the kitchen.

Just before he disappeared, Sirius turned and mouthed something at Remus, “Get dressed.”

The door swung shut, and Remus stood, mildly perplexed, in the hallway for a few more seconds. He shrugged. He had no idea what Sirius planned to do, he might just be here to abduct Remus and take him back to Grimmauld Place against his parent's wishes. If that was true, getting dressed and packed was the first thing Remus should do.

He jogged up the stairs, palmed open his bedroom door and began stripping off his pyjamas. He rooted through his drawers, and pulled out a t-shirt and some jeans. He threw them on quickly, and dragged his suitcase out from under his bed. Before he began throwing items in, he glanced at the mirror on his wall, neatening his hair.

Someone began to come up the stairs, and Remus waited to hear his fate. Sirius's head poked into his bedroom. He smiled triumphantly.

“Are you packed?” He asked, entering the room.

“Serious question...” Remus began, sitting on his bed.

He watched Sirius wander around his room, trying to keep his thoughts clean. Sirius had been in his bedroom before, but he'd been with Peter and James too. This time it was different. It was just Sirius, and they were older now, and Remus was suddenly aware that he was sat on his bed. He jumped up like it had set on fire beneath him.

Sirius didn't notice as he ran a finger down the spine of one of Remus's books. “Why do you have so many books?” He asked, sounding disgusted.

“To read. But answer truthfully, have you cursed my parents?”

“Nope.” Sirius said, eyeing his reflection in the mirror. His eyes met Remus's in the glass, and he winked. Remus felt himself blush again and looked away quickly.

“Slipped a potion into their tea?”

“No.”

“Then how did you do that?” Remus asked, watching Sirius wander around his room.

Sirius looked at everything. From the pictures of The Marauders on the wall, to the columns of books all over the floor. He rummaged through his drawers, his wardrobes, and fingered the letters on his desk. Remus would have protested at this obvious violation of privacy but he just wanted to know how Sirius had convinced his parents to let him go.

“I'm charming and good looking.” Sirius said, as though he was speaking to a child.

“ _Right,_ of course.” Remus said, rolling his eyes. He gently pushed Sirius away from his wardrobe and pulled out his clothes, chucking them towards his suitcase. He didn't pay much attention to what he was packing. He shoved his feet into his trainers and turned around to fold his clothes into the case.

When he turned around though, they were already done. Sirius was lying across Remus's bed next to the case, watching him through his dark lashes. Remus pointed at his case in question and Sirius grinned, “You don't have to thank me. Let's go.”

Remus briefly wondered how Sirius had folded everything so neatly and so fast, but Sirius zipped up the case and stood up expectantly, before he could ask. He grabbed Remus's hand, apparently oblivious to the sharp intake of breath Remus did, and lead him down the stairs. Hope and John were waiting in the hallway, and Remus walked over to them, leaving Sirius at the front door.

“Thanks.” He whispered.

His mum neatened his hair annoyingly, and whispered, “Stay in the guest house on Friday, for us, okay? And drink your wolfsbane.”

Remus didn't let his confusion at the words _guest house_ show, and nodded instead. Whatever Sirius had said to them obviously worked, so he would just go along with it. He turned and left through the open door and found Sirius leaning against the side of his house.

A broom floated near him and fear took hold of Remus, squeezing the air from his lungs. He felt an icy drip in his chest.

“What the hell is that!” He choked.

Sirius glanced down at the broom, feigning innocence, and looked back to Remus, “It's a broom, Moony, you do know what a broom is, don't you?”

“What is it doing here?” Remus asked, sounding hysterical to his own ears.

“It's our transport.” Sirius grinned, he mounted the broom. As his hands wrapped around the wood between his legs, Remus's mind was suddenly catapulted into less than clean thoughts, and he had to forcefully drag his mind away from the imagery it created.

He focused all his energy on the terror that had seized him, no way was he getting onto a broom. They could go by floo network or walk or something, but he would not – absolutely not – fly there. Not with Sirius. He voiced as much, and Sirius's eyes lit up with mirth.

“There's no fireplaces in Grimmauld Place,” Sirius shrugged, and Remus felt sick to his stomach. Sirius stretched across the broom, practically lying down on it, as he continued, “No fireplaces  _at all,_ Mother doesn't like contact with people not of Black blood.  _And_ I live over an hour away by foot.”

“But-”

“Oh, precious Moonbeam, I won't fly high, I promise.” Sirius said, putting on a patronising voice. He sat up and pouted down at Remus as the broom bobbed gently.

“Fuck you.” Remus hissed through clenched teeth.

Sirius rolled his eyes with exaggeration, “I promise I won't risk your life for a few kicks, now come on, before Prongs and Wormy eat all the food.”

Remus kept his weary eyes on the broom, as though it would suddenly turn into a monster and eat him. Then again, fighting a broom monster was probably a hundred times safer than getting on a broom with Sirius _'I endanger my own life a lot'_ Black. Remus had seen Sirius and James on their brooms a hundred times, and he still lost his breath every time one of them nose-dived for fun.

“Remus John Lupin, get on this broom before I leave you here.” Sirius commanded.

Remus sighed, and steeled himself. He could do this. He hoisted himself onto the thin pole of wood and glanced around for somewhere to place his hands. He pursed his lips when he realised there was only one place to put them. As the broom slowly rose into the air, Remus wrapped his arms around Sirius, too scared to be happy about what he was doing.

As they rose higher, the air got colder and Remus wished he'd brought a jacket. He shuffled closer to Sirius on the broom, praying his thoughts would stay clean and his body wouldn't betray him. Sirius's leather jacket was cold against his skin, but he could feel Sirius's body heat on his hands, where they touched his t-shirt. The broom continued it's too-fast climb and Remus held his breath, counting to one hundred to distract himself.

He shivered and the broom slowed in it's flying. Sirius tilted and angled himself to look questioningly at Remus. His hair fluttered about his face in the wind. Remus tightened his grip on Sirius fearfully, and wide-eyed, asked, “What the fuck are you doing!”

The broom was still flying forward, albeit much slower, and they were miles high in the air. So high, that had Remus had the courage to look down, he probably wouldn't have been able to make out anything but dots of light from the street lamps. And Sirius was stupid enough to try and turn around to face him! He was mad.

“Are you cold?” Sirius asked, looking unnaturally calm given the situation.

"What the fuck are you doing!” Remus repeated, as Sirius began to wiggle around, sending the broom jolting this way and that. Remus held onto Sirius in a vice-like grip, even as Sirius started to take off his jacket. It wasn't an easy thing to do with Remus clinging to him, but somehow he managed it without killing them both in a fiery broom crash.

Holding onto the broom with only his thighs, Sirius offered the jacket to Remus, still angling around to face him. Remus stared blankly at the jacket, and Sirius rolled his eyes, “Take the jacket, you're cold.”

“Sirius.” Remus said, slowly, it was his turn to be patronising, “If you think I can release you, long enough to put your jacket on when we're this high, you really are stupid.”

“I promise you won't fall, and if you do I promise I'll fly down to catch you. Even if I don't catch you, I promise I'll cry at your funeral.” He laughed and Remus glared at him. He stopped laughing, “Okay, not funny. Put the jacket on, Moony, or we sit here forever.”

“I can't!” Remus practically shouted. There was no way his hands were releasing Sirius, it was a miracle he was even conscious to witness this height really. Any second now a strong breeze could come and knock him off, and even Sirius, with his arrogant sense of superior flying skills, wouldn't be able to save him.

“Fine, for Merlin's sakes!” Sirius twisted even further, almost slipping off the broom. He hung the jacket over Remus's shoulders, but it wouldn't stay. After the third time trying, it slipped off Remus's shoulders again.

Except, this time, Sirius wasn't fast enough to catch it. His fingers closed around nothing, as the jacket floated downwards. Remus was shocked enough to glance down. He immediately regretted it as bile crawled in his throat.

_Too high._

They were way too high and Sirius's jacket had just taken a fatal fall off the edge. It was gone, some muggle would find it hanging from a fence tomorrow. It's not like they could just fly down and catch it...

It clicked in Remus's mind, seemingly the same time it did in Sirius's. 

“NO!” Remus shouted as Sirius twisted back around to the front. He leaned forward and the broom tipped. Remus tightened his grip on Sirius, probably squeezing too hard, but Sirius didn't say anything, he just kept leaning forward. “DON'T BE SO STUPID!”

“Remus, it's my favourite jacket.” Sirius replied simply.

Remus knew there was no arguing with a madman. So he leaned forward too, burying his face in the cloth of Sirius's t-shirt, as the broom pitched forward sickeningly. They were facing the earth at a ninety degree angle now, and if Remus survived this nose dive, he would make sure Sirius didn't survive the rest of the week.

And then they fell.

Air whizzed past them, creating goosebumps across Remus's arms. He was too scared to think of anything except the rock hard ground approaching fast. They were flying straight down, and both of them had slipped slightly forward on the broom. Remus had to put all his faith in Sirius's grip, because if he released the broom even slightly they'd both go hurtling to their death.

Remus had the fabric of Sirius's t-shirt clenched in his fists. It was horrifying. His heart had climbed into his throat, and he'd left his stomach behind. There wasn't enough breath in his lungs to scream, so Remus just remained frozen, hoping he lived. Hoping they both survived the crash.

Hoping he survived long enough to murder Sirius, who was shaking with laughter in front of him. It took Remus a long time to realise they were no longer pitched forward, but had straightened off.

Painstakingly slowly, Remus pulled his head away from Sirius's shoulder blade. Only now registering the smell of Sirius's skin, mixed with the cigarette he must have smoked on the way to pick him up.

He disentangled himself quickly, practically flopping off the broom, desperate to be on solid ground again. He collapsed into the grass, feeling like his heart had stopped permanently.

Sirius was still laughing, and Remus glared at him, running through every hex he knew and trying to find one big enough for his revenge. Sirius laughed for a long time, collapsing in the grass too, he tossed his rescued leather jacket onto Remus. Remus shoved it off and turned his head to continue glaring at the gorgeous, evil boy next to him.

“I hate you.” He panted, out of breath from his torturous ordeal.

“I love you too, Moonbeam.” Sirius winked. Remus looked away up at the sky, where the first dots of stars had begun to appear. It was a cloudless night, and Remus thought it would be a beautiful night, if he hadn't almost  _died._

The grass beneath him was damp, but he didn't have the energy to get up yet. If he stood up now, his legs would be too weak to hold him. Sirius would probably laugh some more, and he'd actually have to punch him in the face, so it was best to just lie here for a bit.

“How far do we have to go?” Remus asked quietly, once his breathing had returned to normal. He felt like speaking loudly would destroy the calmness of the night. It was so still and so quiet, it was hard to remember other people existed.

Sirius seemed to have the same idea, as he whispered, “We're there. This is my neighbours garden.”

Remus pushed himself up, feeling his legs shake beneath him, and set off walking towards the gate near the house. Sirius followed, picking up his jacket, his broom following him like an obedient pet. Remus shivered slightly. It wasn't even cold, but he was still a bit shaky from his experience.

Sirius misinterpreted his shiver and offered his jacket again. Remus accepted it. He could appreciate the comfort of Sirius's jacket around him, now there was no chance of him falling to his death. Something dawned on him.

“Where's my suitcase?” He asked, he didn't have the energy to panic, otherwise he would have.

“Oh, your parents are sending it by floo network.” Sirius said, jogging ahead and entering the neighbouring house, which seconds ago, Remus was sure hadn't been there.

“Wait...” Remus called, slowing to a halt, “What did you just say?” 

Sirius didn't reply as he ducked inside the house. Remus felt a slow burn of anger fill him. Oh, he would murder Sirius. He ran into the house, and stopped abruptly.

His murderous thoughts disappeared briefly as he took in the extravagant hallway in Twelve Grimmauld Place. It had expensive looking hardwood floors, and walls covered with portraits of rich witches and wizards, who disapproved of Remus as he entered. The hallway was long and huge, several doors lined both walls, and Remus wondered just how big this house was. There was a troll foot umbrella stand at the bottom of a huge flight of stairs, which seemed to twist upwards forever.

Remus was distracted by voices from a room down the hallway, and his anger returned. He marched into the lounge, throwing the door open with a bang, and pointed his wand at Sirius's face, “Guess who's going to be bald for the rest of the year.”

Sirius held up his hands in surrender, and eyed Remus's wand nervously, “I'm sorry.”

Next to them a fire crackled loudly in the fireplace,  _in the supposedly non-existent fireplace of Grimmauld Place_ , and Remus's suitcase stood nearby, covered with a thin layer of soot.

James was stretched across a velvet sofa, “Hey Moony, I heard you and Sirius had a wild ride.”

The tiniest twitch of traitorous smile began at the corner of Sirius's lips, and Remus narrowed his eyes at him. Addressing James, he said, “I could make you bald as well, Prongs.”

Sirius reached out and clasped Remus's wrist softly, he lowered his arm and smiled, “I got you here, remember? Without me, you'd still be at home.”

“And without you, I wouldn't have almost had a heart attack!” Remus hissed.

“But I-”

“I hope there's a storm this week. Don't even think about climbing into bed with me, unless you want to wake up bald.” Remus interrupted, sticking his wand back in his pocket.

“Fine,” Sirius shrugged, “I'll share with Prongs.”

“The hell you will!” James chimed in, chucking the freshly opened bottle of firewhiskey to Remus.

Remus unscrewed the cap and gulped at the liquid. The familiar burning sensation spread from his stomach outwards, and he felt himself relax.

“Wormtail?” Sirius asked.

“Sorry, Sirius.” Wormtail responded. He seemed oblivious to the pumpkin flesh that dotted his face.

Remus smiled at Sirius, who pouted back at him. He wandered over to the velvet sofa and sat down, forcing James to move his legs. Remus wasn't quite finished with his revenge, but he'd have to think of something bigger later, right now he was just happy to not be a splattered human on the side of the road.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this might be my favourite chapter of anything I've ever written, ever. 
> 
> Thanks for your kudos's so far! I need you guys.


	5. Animal Wars: Prongs v Padfoot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Marauders are drunk, the Slytherin heirlooms are destroyed, there's only one thing remaining... ANIMAL WARS

**James**

 

Mere hours after Remus's arrival, they were all drunk. James and Sirius were lay in the hallway, staring up the middle of the stairs. Five floors up – that's right, Twelve Grimmauld Place had _five floors,_ James was incredibly impressed – were Peter and Remus.

James could feel the world spinning beneath him, and it was making him feel sick. He'd had far too much to drink. He was kind of glad Remus was as responsible as he was. He'd suggested saving the other bottles of firewhiskey for the rest of the week, rather than drinking them all now.

When Sirius had protested, as expected, Remus had been ready, suggesting that they destroy some of the Slytherin propaganda that lived in this house. Sirius had thought it was the best idea he'd ever heard, and James was sure that had nothing to do with the alcohol. They'd collected what they could find, in their drunken state, and levitated it all up to the fifth floor.

“PULL!” Sirius shouted, his voice echoing in the cavernous hallway.

A plate appeared five floors above Sirius and James, having been thrown by Peter or Remus. It began to pick up speed, spinning as it fell. The candlelight glinted off the surface, and James couldn't make out the image on the front.

“You.” Sirius said at the last possible second.

“Confringo!” James shouted. The orange spell launched from his aimed wand and smacked directly into the plate. It exploded loudly, echoing inside his head, sending shards of fine china flying across the house. Both James and Sirius burst into laughter. It was never not funny to destroy expensive Slytherin heirlooms.

After seeing Sirius in the state he'd been in this morning, James would gladly burn everything in Grimmauld Place to the ground. He didn't care about the consequences. No one,  _no one,_ could hurt his best mate like they had done. James couldn't even begin to-

“PULL!” Sirius shouted again.

-imagine what Sirius was going through. The worst thing his mother ever did to him was bake raisin cookies instead of chocolate chip. This week would be good for Sirius. He could explore his own house without fear of his family, and he could destroy his relatives most prized possessions. It was like therapy... only with more explosions.

A porcelain snake was dropped over the fifth floor bannister, and Sirius readied his wand. Just as it fell past the third floor landing, Sirius shouted, “Expulso!”

The snake was hit by a flash of blue light, and pieces of porcelain were flung outwards. A piece bounced off the wall, and landed on James's t-shirt. He brushed it off.

“PULL!” Sirius shouted again.

Instead of more Slytherin crap, Moony's head appeared, as he leaned over the bannister, “It's all gone!”

“What do you mean s'all gone!” Sirius shouted back.

“I mean, there is nothing left!” James could practically see the eye-roll Remus did.

“Oh... What now?” Sirius asked James.

Remus began to come down the stairs, his footsteps sounding amplified in the empty house. James shrugged, the hard wood floor digging into his spine. Pieces of porcelain and Slytherin-themed tapestry dotted the floor around them. He turned to look at Sirius, the room continued to roll long after James had stopped.

It had only been fourteen hours since James had arrived and seen Sirius passed out on his bedroom floor, but it felt like a distant memory. There was colour in Sirius's cheeks, he didn't look half dead and drained of blood any longer. He was breathing with ease and not choking on his dusty floor.

And he was smiling. His smile was so wide it was threatening to split his face in half. James smiled back at him, feeling soppy, drunken love for his best friend.

There were many terrible things you could say about Sirius – James knew that, having said half of them himself – but no one could deny that he was a fighter. He'd lived with his abusive family for five years since becoming a Gryffindor, and he hardly complained about it. In fact, James had to ask a thousand questions before he managed to squeeze even the smallest details from him.

“We should sleep.” Remus offered, jumping down the last four steps, and almost knocking over the troll foot umbrella stand. His landing was wobbly and unstable, but somehow he sounded sober. Unlike James or Sirius.

“Aw, Moo- _nee_ , killjoy.” Sirius mumbled, even as his eyes drifted closed.

“Wormtail fell asleep two hours ago.” Remus said, sitting cross-legged at James and Sirius's feet. James shuffled into a sitting position. Remus was blurry, and James checked whether his glasses were still on his face. They were. Just the alcohol, then.

“Even with all the 'plosions?” James asked, his words blurring together in his mouth. He was so drunk. Remus was, as always, right about everything. They should sleep, it was three in the morning, and they had a hell of a week planned. James was that kind of drunk where he wanted to lie down anywhere that was horizontal and sleep for eighteen hours straight.

Remus nodded and Sirius snickered to himself. James used the wall to pull himself upwards, dislodging an old family portrait in the process. He pointed to Sirius, and Remus climbed up too. With Remus's help, ignoring the sickening feeling in his belly, James hoisted Sirius to his feet. Sirius stumbled slightly and wrapped his arms around both their shoulders, planting slightly wet kisses on the sides of their heads. He really was a dog sometimes.

“C'mon, Padfoot.” James muttered, using the wall to keep himself upright, “Where's yer bed?”

“Oh, Mr. Prongs.” Sirius whispered, “You tryin' to take advantage of my drunken state?”

Remus and Sirius snickered together and James rolled his eyes, immediately regretting it when the house gave a sickening lurch to the left. They managed to guide Sirius towards the stairs, but getting him up them was a whole different problem.

“Sirius, step upwards.” Remus ordered, sounding frustrated and a little amused as Sirius slouched heavily between them.

James laughed, and Sirius seemed to take James's laughter as an encouragement to continue being useless. Each of them had had to fight a drunken Sirius at one point in their lives.

There had been that time Sirius and James had been convinced streaking around Hogwarts at midnight was the best idea ever, and Remus and Peter had had to literally tackle them to stop them.

There was the time both Sirius and Remus had gotten monumentally drunk and had wandered off in separate ways. It had taken hours for Peter and James to track them down. James had found Sirius on the edge of the forbidden forest, muttering something about  _damn centaurs stealing my things._

But by far the most prominent memory James had, happened only a few months ago. After hogging the firewhiskey bottle, Sirius had decided he was going to fight the giant squid. Firewhiskey had effectively slowed down their reactions, and by the time the three of them had realised what Sirius had said, he was already halfway down the staircase. They had caught up to him outside, where he was stripping in preparation, and had had to wrestle him to the ground to stop him from drowning himself.

This was just as hard though. Apparently Sirius had an inability to stand up straight, and with James's spinning head, and Remus's short temper, Sirius wasn't getting to bed any time soon. Remus cast a hard-worn glance at James over Sirius's shoulders, and together they navigated him back into one of the lounges.

Sirius slid out from between them and flopped onto the sofa. As he shuffled to get comfy, James sighed, “There goes my bed.”

“Yeah.” Remus said.

They watched fondly as Sirius kicked his legs out and wiggled around until he was comfortable. Then, as though he hadn't just been awake and exploding his family's possessions, he fell straight to sleep, gently snoring into the fabric of the sofa, his mouth hanging open.

Remus patted James's shoulder, “I'm off to bed.”

“Wait, where am I s'pose to sleep?” James asked, as Remus staggered towards the door.

He paused in the doorway, and flashed a mischievous grin, “Your bed, your problem.” He left the room, the sound of his slightly mismatched footsteps getting quieter.

“Damn you, Remus Lupin!” James snapped, slightly too loudly, he realised, when Sirius jolted awake. James nodded to him and he smiled back drunkenly. Sirius began to wiggle around again, and James draped himself across a velvet armchair.

It was as soft as the couch was, but it wasn't big enough for James's tall body. After struggling for a comfy position for a few seconds, he gave up, and sat up straight, stretching his legs across the rug. Sirius was watching him through bleary eyes.

“Go on then, tell me.” He said, his voice slightly muffled by the sofa.

“Tell you what?” James asked. The world was still spinning beneath him, but it was slowing down. His stomach didn't feel like it was doing quite as many flips.

“About you and Evans. S'appening?”

“Nothingshappening.” James said, his words tumbling out of his mouth in a confusing mass of syllables.

“Liar.” Sirius said, narrowing his eyes. He moved his hand under his head and waited expectantly.

“There's.. nothing... going on...” James said, slower this time. Judging by the amused look Sirius threw at him, he'd said it way too slow.

“Such a liar.”

“Sirius, really, nothing is-”

“The biggest liar to ever lie in the history of lying!” Sirius spoke loudly over the end of James's sentence, drowning it out. His hair was almost messy enough to rival James's. _Almost._

“How did you know?” James asked with a sigh.

“You're moping about.”

“I am not moping!”

“You're like whiny baby James all over again.  _Why doesn't Lily love me? When will Lily realise I'm the best for her? Why does she hang out with Snape?_ ” Sirius mocked, doing what was probably supposed to be an impression of James but was really just him talking in a slightly higher voice. Unless that was what James actually sounded like...

“Piss off.” James snapped, slouching in the chair to get comfortable.

_“I wonder what Lily's doing right now. Isn't Lily's hair so pretty? Isn't Lily so pretty? Hey, Sirius, look at Lily she's so perfect and shiny. She's like an angel without wings and she's-”_

“Okay, I get it.” James said, covering his face with his hands, “You can stop now.”

“So tell me then.” Sirius whined.

“I'm a giant dick who always says the wrong thing.”

“Yeah, that sounds about right.” Sirius said.

James lowered his hands and watched him. He had somehow managed to locate a bottle of pumpkin juice, and was attempting to drink it while lying down. It was trailing out the corner of his mouth and down his neck onto the sofa, but he didn't seem to mind.

“I told you, now it's your turn.” James said.

“Okay, when we were fourteen, and I told you I didn't get a handjob off-”

“Not _that_ , Padfoot.” James interrupted.

“Oh. Then what?”

“What happened this morning?”

Sirius was unusually quiet. He was far too interested in the label on the juice bottle. He dug his thumbnail into the paper, tearing it off in tiny pieces. James waited, but when it was clear Sirius wasn't going to say anything, he said, “I think we should talk about it.”

Sirius sighed and ran a hand through his hair, somehow neatening it in one go. He sat up, swinging his legs over the edge of the sofa. He looked at James sadly. With another sigh, he said, “Yeah we should...” A smirk crept across his face, “Or we could have Animal Wars round two.”

“No, we should talk about it.” James said. Although the idea of turning into a stag and claiming his rightful title of “Animal Warrior King” did sound appealing. He pressed on though, Sirius needed to talk about his family, and he needed to do it now, while he was drunk.

“What's the matter, 'fraid you'll lose again?” Sirius asked, with overly wide eyes. James knew exactly what he was doing. He was trying to get a rise out of James and hopefully distract James from Sirius's family... and it was working.

“Excuse you! You cheated last time. And I have antlers! They're like knives attached to my head. You'll be the loser!”

Sirius pulled a mocking face, “They're sticks! Let's see your sticks stand up against my razor sharp teeth.”

“You're a puppy, Sirius!”

“I'm a wolf!” Sirius snapped.

“Bit arrogant, considering we have an actual wolf!”

“Pfft! Remus is a werewolf not a wolf. His animagus would be a bunny rabbit.” Sirius smirked, “Don't drag Moony into this, just because you know you'll lose.” 

“Fight me, Sirius!” James shouted, jumping up from the armchair. He didn't need his wand to transform anymore, and neither did Sirius. One minute there were two boys stood in the living room, the next a stag and a dog were standing off against each other.

Distantly, James realised how bad of an idea this was. He knew he needed to talk to Sirius about his family. But then Padfoot growled at him, and he was dragged into Animal Wars once more. He stomped his hoof angrily. Hell, if they destroyed more of Grimmauld Place during their battle, it would make Sirius happy anyway.

 


	6. Dusty Rooms and Old Portraits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The winner of Animal Wars is hurt and exhausted, the group splits in two, and something goes terribly, horribly wrong.

**Peter**

 

Ghostly fingers trailed down Peter's neck and spine, and he jolted awake. It took a good couple of seconds before he remembered where he was. The fifth floor of Grimmauld Place, curled up in the middle of the hallway. The wooden floor was rock hard beneath him, and his shoulder ached from the angle he'd slept at. He yawned loudly. Remus had probably left him here last night, he was alone.

But then... Who's fingers were those?

Peter practically leapt five foot in the air, he couldn't get up fast enough. He aimed his wand and spun around in circles, looking for the owner of those icy cold fingers. Only, there was no one there, no one at all. He was just tired...

He had just imagined those fingers, it was due to how creepy Grimmauld Place was. He ignored the fear that had grown in his chest like flowers, and made his slow descent down the five flights of stairs between him and his friends. It was slow going, thanks to the foggy feeling in his head and the lead inside his legs, but he eventually made it. He almost tripped on a large piece of porcelain in the hallway, on his way to the kitchen.

Moony sat at the dining table, sipping his tea. Of all the things Peter had learnt about Grimmauld Place, he had not expected it to have tea bags. Maybe Remus had brought them from home. He glanced up when Peter walked in and pushed a plate of toast towards him. Peter sat down and munched on some toast.

“Where are they?” Peter asked, crumbs flying from his mouth with every word.

“It seems we missed Animal Wars round two.” Remus said, a tiny smile playing on his lips. He was trying to act disapproving, but Peter knew he wasn't. As much as he tried to deny it, he was just as amused by Sirius and James's fighting as Peter was.

Remus moved pulled one leg to his chest, and rested his chin on his knee, “There's a sleeping dog and a worn out stag in the lounge.”

“Who do you think won?”

“I DID!” Sirius shouted, breaking the quiet of the kitchen violently. Peter and Remus flinched away from his voice. Peter wasn't exactly hungover, but he could do without the shouting. Sirius walked in, still wearing the clothes he had worn yesterday, and marched straight for the kettle.

He spooned some instant coffee into his cup, and waited for the kettle to boil. Leaning back on the counter while the kettle whistled, flashing a large pink scratch on his face, he yawned. He smiled at Peter, “Mornin' sleeping beauty.”

“Morning.” Peter replied, just as something smashed in the hallway. Remus half stood up out of his chair, Sirius stood there smirking, and Peter spun around to stare at the door fearfully. His heart gave a jolt. It was the ghost, or the demon, or whatever had touched his neck this morning. It was coming for them. It was opening the door.

It was... a hungover stag.

Remus sat down with a laugh, and Peter felt himself relax. The sight of a drunken stag was not an unusual sight for The Marauders. In fact, it was pretty much commonplace, next to the sight of a drunken dog. It never failed to make them laugh though. As James stumbled into the kitchen, his antlers scratched deep gouges into the wall. If stags could look confused, Peter was sure he would.

“Morning, Prongs.” Remus said, smirking into his mug.

The stag spun to face Remus. It seemed perplexed for a moment longer, before it transformed. James ended up on all fours on the kitchen floor. He too was in the clothes he had worn yesterday, and he stumbled up with groan.

“Tell me there's more coffee, Padfoot.” James mumbled, barely audible over the laughter in the kitchen.

“Nuh-uh.” Sirius said, grinning widely, and shaking his finger, “Address me properly.”

James gritted his teeth at Sirius, and corrected himself, “Make me some damn coffee, oh true Animal Warrior King.”

Peter laughed some more as James limped over to the dining table and collapsed into one of the chairs. He was sporting a rather hefty bruise on his arm, and he looked exhausted. Dark circles lined his eyes, matching Sirius's.

“What time did you go to sleep?” Remus asked, putting his empty mug down, and reaching for some toast off Peter's plate.

“I don't know.” James groaned, lowering his head to the table, “The sun was up.”

“The sun was up, Prongs was losing, it was a beautiful moment.” Sirius said, leaning over James's slumped form and placing a mug of coffee near his hands.

He took his own seat next to Remus and leant his head on his shoulder. Remus seemed mildly uncomfortable, but didn't say anything. Sirius wrapped both his hands around his cup.

Another groan came from James's hunched form, and everyone wore matching smirks. After a short silence, where Sirius sipped his coffee, Remus and Peter ate toast, and James slumped perfectly still, James eventually sat up and reached for his quickly cooling coffee. He downed it, no doubt burning his entire throat, and leaned back in his chair.

“What's the plan for today?” Peter asked.

“Sleep.” James mumbled, and Sirius shuffled his head on Remus's shoulder in agreement.

“I'm not tired.” Peter stated.

“Of course you're not.” James mumbled, keeping his eyes closed against the morning sun, “You slept all yesterday.”

“You hit me with a sleepers charm!” Peter protested.

“I'll do it again, if you don't keep your voice down.” James snapped, rubbing his temples.

“We could play Quidditch, or explore the house, or leave curses for Sirius's family, or duel-” Peter offered, trying to think of something they could do. He didn't really want to sit around and do nothing. James and Sirius would sleep, Remus would find a book or something, and Peter would be left to do nothing.

“Or,” James interrupted, “And hear me out on this one, we could sleep for the entire day and night, and do something on Tuesday instead.”

“I like that idea.” Sirius said.

Remus shook his shoulders, intentionally jolting Sirius's head around, “No, I agree with Peter. If you two had gone to sleep at a normal hour, you wouldn't be in this mess.”

“If you hadn't left me with a drunken Sirius, we also wouldn't be in this mess. You know he needs at least one responsible wizard with him at all times.” James murmured.

“Yes, because it's my fault you decided to fight a dog.” Remus said, rolling his eyes.

“We'll explore.” Sirius said, shutting his eyes. He had finished his coffee and lowered the mug to the table, somehow managing to keep his head on Remus's shoulder for the entire drink. He stifled a yawn, “I've been in ten rooms out of about a hundred.”

“There's probably dark magic in some of them.” James said, looking interested. He still looked exhausted, but there was a spark in his eye. Peter nodded excitedly. The idea of a dark magic filled exploration, definitely appealed to him.

“DIBS ON MOONY!” Sirius shouted quickly, making everyone jump.

“Aw.” Peter whined.

“Fuck.” James muttered.

Remus rolled his eyes and stood up, eliciting a whine from Sirius, and brushed crumbs off his clothes, “Yeah sure, you all want me now. Where's this enthusiasm when we play Quidditch?”

“We all have our strengths, Moonbeam.” Sirius said, ignoring the glare Remus threw at him, “Yours is defense against dark magic, and anything that can be learnt through books. James is Quidditch, and probably potions now that he's dating Evans,” James nodded, and Sirius continued, “Peter's is muggle cooking and charms, and mine is everything else.”

“How modest.” Remus smiled.

Sirius stood up and the two of them walked to the door. Sirius grinned smugly at Remus, “I'm pretty good at flying too.”

“Take a nosedive off a cliff, Sirius.” Remus replied, leaving the kitchen. Sirius laughed, letting the kitchen door swing shut behind him.

Peter turned to look at James. His eyes were closed again and he was still leaning back in his chair, the angle of his neck didn't look comfortable. Peter waited, and eventually James cracked one eye open and looked at him. Peter sighed.

“Fine, we'll go. But if we get attacked and I'm too tired to defend myself, it's your fault.” James muttered, standing up with a groan. His joints popped loudly, it was like he'd aged seventy years in one night.

“How is it my fault?” Peter whined.

“It just is.” James said, leaving the kitchen. Peter grabbed the last slice of his now cold toast and followed.

They walked up the stairs without speaking, hearing the distant laughter of Sirius and Remus, and the crunching sound of Peter's toast. Maybe the sight of decapitated House Elves should put Peter off his food, but it didn't. Not even the hideous portraits of former Blacks could put him off.

They reached the top of the third floor staircase and James panted, bent over with exhaustion, “Right, can't go any further. This is our corridor.”

Peter swallowed his last mouthful of dry toast, and lead them to the first door. He clutched the handle but it wouldn't budge. He shoved his shoulder into it a few times, and still nothing. He turned to James and James sighed, “We have magic.”

“Oh yeah.” Peter said, he pulled his wand from his pocket, sending a chocolate frog wrapper floating to the ground. He pointed it at the door handle, “Alohomora.”

The door gave a groan, and it felt as if the whole house shuddered. Peter cast a fearful glance at James, and saw his own expression mirrored in his face. James pulled his wand down from behind his ear in preparation. The door opened of it's own accord, creaking as it swung inwards. The room inside was pitch black, seemingly made of emptiness and nothing more.

Peter gave a shiver, had it just got several degrees colder in here? He remembered the ghostly fingers that had brushed over him this morning. Had he really just imagined those?

He cleared his throat. He was just being paranoid, Sirius lived in this house, he'd know if there was some kind of murderous creature in it... wouldn't he? Sirius and Remus's laughter had disappeared, it was just him and James left.

“Ready?” James asked, pushing gently on Peter's shoulder. Peter nodded his head, it was just a room without light, that's all. It was locked because no one used it. There were probably a lot of empty, useless rooms in this house, this was just one of them.

“Lumos.” The two of them whispered together, as they stepped into the room.

The light from their wands barely penetrated the suffocating darkness. James disappeared from behind Peter, and Peter turned around in a loose circle. The room smelt like mothballs. He could see the door to the bright hallway, but the rest of him was surrounded by darkness.

His voice shook slightly as he spoke, “Prongs? Where are you?”

“Incendio.” James's voice came from somewhere to the right of Peter, the room was suddenly lit by a burning candle on the wall. The light flickered, and Peter and James took in their surroundings.

They were stood in a room with black walls, and a covered window. The floor, like every other floor in the house, was hard wood. Two candles hung from a serpent shaped sconce on the wall. The serpent had a sparkling eye, made of emerald. Cobwebs littered the corners of the room, and dust floated gently in the air.

There was no furniture, excluding the dark purple, velvet armchair in the middle of the room, which was covered with a thick layer of dust. The armchair faced something covered with a large blood-red coloured sheet.

There was nothing about this room that Peter didn't hate. It sent shivers down his spine, and fear had once again sprouted in his chest. This house would be the reason for his nightmares. How Sirius lived here was beyond him.

James stepped towards the red sheet. He cast a questioning look at Peter, as his fingers clutched around the sheet. Peter wanted to shake his head. He wanted to leave this room and sit downstairs. He'd rather stare at the wall than see what was underneath that sheet. Whatever it was, was bad enough to be covered up, maybe it should stay that way.

But, he also wanted to impress James. James, who no longer looked tired, and instead looked incredibly excited to see underneath the sheet. Of course, James wasn't scared. Was he ever scared?

Peter nodded, and James pulled on the sheet. It seemed to take forever to fall, floating impossibly, looking more like actual blood than it should. When it landed on the ground, James took a step away in shock.

The man in the portrait looked just like Sirius. He had the same hair, and the same face, and the same body shape. But he was older, and his face was half covered with a neatly trimmed beard. He had been facing to the left of the portrait, looking bored, but when the fabric had settled on the floor, he half turned to face them.

He smiled at them in such a familiar way, that Peter couldn't help it, he asked, “Sirius?”

“It's Cetus, actually.” The man drawled, eyeing them suspiciously.

His portrait was dust-free, and he looked freshly painted, but something told them he was old, maybe even centuries old. He was in old fashioned robes, with frills and everything. The background showed a plain room, painted black. Probably the one they were in right now.

“Right, well, uh, hello.” James said, struggling to speak for the first time ever.

Peter felt something tight around his chest. Red flags were going up in his mind, there was something wrong about this 'Cetus' guy. Why had he been covered? And why was he grinning like he knew the world's biggest secret?

“And you are?” The man spoke as if he was perpetually bored.

“James, uh, James Potter. And this is Peter Pettigrew.”

“James, uh, James Potter,” The portrait repeated, “What are you doing in Grimmauld Place?”

“We were just leaving actually.” James said quickly. He must have sensed the foreboding air that swept through the room. This portrait was not to be trusted. James and Peter had learnt an important lesson,  _anything that is covered must remain covered._

James began to drag Peter back towards the door, but for some reason Peter couldn't pull his eyes away from Cetus. The man looked back at him, with an air of mystery. Peter felt like the painted man knew something, like he knew something they didn't, something bad. The man watched with bored eyes, but the smirk that played on his lips sent panic through Peter's body.

He looked away, he couldn't bare to look at this man any longer. They were steps away from the door now, soon they would be free of Cetus and his all-knowing smirk. James had a strong grip on Peter's shirt, as he lead them to the exit.

Before either of them could step through, there was a deafening bang as the door, and every other door in the entire house, slammed shut at once. James clenched his fist tighter on Peter's shoulder. They were trapped. If either of them had been capable of speaking, they probably would have reeled off curse after curse. But they couldn't, they just stood there, frozen, staring at the closed door.

“No,” A voice rang out behind them, a hint of amusement ran along the boredom, “You're not going anywhere.”

 


	7. The Wolf and The Steak

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus is trapped in a romance novel, Sirius gives helpful fashion advice, and James loses his temper.

**Remus**

 

Remus hadn't breathed in an alarmingly long time. He took in a deep breath that was much louder than he'd intended. Sirius shifted next to him, but neither of them looked at each other. They stared open-mouthed at the door. The door which, seconds ago, had slammed shut on it's own. Along with, what sounded like, every other door in number twelve Grimmauld Place.

After a pregnant pause, where the door slamming echoed in their minds, Sirius finally asked, “What the bloody fuck was that?”

“I...” Remus took another deep breath. His heart rate had shot right up from fear, he felt out of breath and terrified. He whispered, as though whatever evil force had trapped them here, could hear him, “I have no idea.”

“Aw, Moonbeam, are you scared?” Sirius smirked. He hid it well, but Remus could tell he was freaked out too.

“Don't call me that.” Remus hissed, still staring at the door. Seriously, what the fuck had happened? Every door slamming at once was definitely not a good thing.

Remus shivered, in the stifling air. He regretted letting Sirius drag him to the fifth floor. It was unbearably hot in this room. Abruptly, Remus stumbled to the window and forced it open. It groaned out of disuse, but eventually swung open.

There was no breeze outside either, but the fresh air poured in, allowing Remus to breath normally again. He leant back against the windowsill, feeling some sense return to his brain. There was no reason to panic. Sure, the door had slammed closed on its own, and neither of them had been able to open it. And sure, Peter and James were lost somewhere in this huge, intimidating house, but that wasn't necessarily a bad thing...

Okay, they were screwed, but at least they were screwed together. This could have happened in the middle of the night, when they were all in separate rooms, and that would have been way worse. As it stood, watching Sirius wander around the bedroom they'd selected to explore, was actually quite relaxing.

Remus hadn't exactly jumped at the idea to explore a bedroom with Sirius, and allow his already over-active imagination to feast on this idea. Now that they were trapped in a bedroom, well, it was a bit like a badly written romance novel.

Remus smiled to himself and Sirius opened the large wardrobe. Inside were dusty, doxy eaten clothes, that looked like they were centuries old. Sirius pulled out a particularly ugly set of orange dress robes and held them against his body.

He winked, “What do you think?”

"Stunning.” Remus said.

Sirius laughed and threw the robes behind him in a crumpled heap. He rooted through the wardrobe some more, and pulled out a hideous pink dress. He waved it at Remus, “This would suit you.”

“I think yellow is more my colour.” Remus deadpanned, making Sirius laugh.

He threw the dress behind him and continued pulling out clothes, making a pile on the floor. Eventually, he emptied the entire wardrobe and flopped down onto the heap, sending a cloud of dust floating above him.

Remus looked around the room they'd chosen. A giant, king sized bed dominated the tiny room, and Remus's mind was running overdrive. The bed was basically begging to be used, with it's enticing silvery sheets. Remus ignored the call of the bed, and the sigh that Sirius let out from his nest of clothes.

There were four photo frames on the two bedside tables, and all of them were empty. It was weird. A large gilded frame hung on one wall, and it bore no subject whatsoever, just a blank background.

Besides the bed, the wardrobe, and the empty photo frames, there wasn't much else. A few candle holders, and sconces, nothing of interest.

Remus stood up from the windowsill and wandered over to the bed. He picked up one of the photo frames and admired it. It was beautifully ornate, made of silver, and adorned with golden flowers that glinted in the sunlight. The photo frame looked expensive and hand crafted, yet there was no picture in it.

He flipped it around, looking for a note or a caption, or anything, but found nothing. Just the back of the photo frame, and nothing more. He put down the frame carefully, and turned around. He gasped when he saw how close Sirius was. He hadn't heard him stand up.

Sirius looked away from the photo frame and met Remus's eyes. He smiled, “Don't be so jumpy, Moonbeam.”

Remus clenched his teeth, “Stop calling me that!”

“Why?” Sirius asked, smirking infuriatingly.

Remus rolled his eyes. He wasn't going to play this game, _again._ He sidestepped Sirius, with the intention of going back to the window but Sirius caught his wrist. With surprising ease, Sirius pulled him onto the bed and Remus felt his heart rate speed up, this time not because of the doors. He freed his wrist from Sirius and shuffled away from him.

Settling into the comfy sheets, and lying down on the dusty pillows, Remus asked, “How long do you think we'll be trapped?”

“Minutes, hours, days, weeks, years, who knows?” Sirius said, lying down next to Remus.

“Ever the optimist.”

“It could be worse Moonbeam, you could be-”

“-trapped with someone who insists on calling me Moonbeam?” Remus asked, sitting up and glaring down at him. Sirius chuckled, his hair spread out across his pillow. Remus couldn't be mad at him, he was – figuratively, and sometimes quite literally – a puppy.

“We're not trapped.”

“Then what would you call it?”

Sirius hummed for a while, and then sat up. He fixed his eyes on Remus's, and Remus suddenly felt the already hot room get a little hotter. They were so close, mere inches apart. Why had he allowed himself to be pulled onto the bed? It was like torturing himself. Maybe if he was braver, he'd make a move. But he wasn't, so he didn't.

The room smelt like mothballs, and dust, and it was unbearably hot. They were trapped five floors above the ground, in a house that likely contained dark magic, it was easily the least romantic place in the world.

And yet, Remus couldn't help the flutter in his chest when Sirius winked, “I'd call it forced to enjoy each other's company.”

Remus struggled for something to say, but there was nothing to say. So he sat, frozen still, staring into Sirius's marble eyes.

It really wasn't fair. It wasn't fair that he was trapped in a room with Sirius, when he wasn't allowed to kiss him. It was like trapping a wolf in a room with a steak it wasn't allowed to eat. Although, Remus didn't like comparing himself and Sirius to a wolf and a steak, it was a little too close to home. Sirius yawned and leant forward, and for a split second Remus thought he was going to kiss him.

He didn't, and Remus couldn't decide if he was relieved or disappointed. Sirius leant to the side and rested his forehead on Remus's shoulder, he smelt like firewhiskey and pumpkin juice. It was torture. It was actual torture. Remus sighed, and focused on the door, willing it to open and free him from this.

* * *

 

**James**

 “ _Listen,_ you dick, you open these doors right now!” James hissed, aiming his wand at the portraits face.

“No.” The portrait repeated for the hundredth time.

“ _Open them.”_ James ordered.

“No.”

“James.” Peter whispered, pulling on James's sleeve nervously.

James shook him off angrily and stepped closer to the portrait, “You think you're funny?”

“Not really.” The portrait said.

The painting was so infuriatingly like Sirius, it was driving James mad. This would be exactly what Sirius would do, except he'd do it to Slytherins and not Gryffindors. James didn't care how much the portrait looked like Sirius, he was one snappy remark away from tearing it to shreds.

“Open. The. Fucking. Doors.” James said, through clenched teeth, pausing between each word for emphasis.

“Hm... No.” The portrait was almost laughing. He didn't look as bored anymore, he was maddeningly amused.

Peter was terrified, and James was furious. He didn't want to hex the portrait though, since he was seemingly the only one who could let them out. If he destroyed the painting, they'd be trapped forever.

Merlin knows what Sirius and Remus thought was happening. Were they trapped too? Were they even okay?

James sighed, giving up. He could threaten the painting all day, but if this Cetus dick didn't want to open the door, he wouldn't. He hooked his wand back behind his ear, and walked over to the covered window.

He dug his fingers behind the boards and began pulling them off forcefully. They came off easier than he was expecting, allowing sunlight to stream into the room. He threw the boards to the ground in anger, and he was sure he heard Cetus laugh.

“You're done asking now?” The portrait asked, when James leant his hands on the windowsill and looked out onto the street. Muggles walked down the path, completely oblivious to the existence of Number Twelve.

“Yes.” James replied. He smiled smugly at the window, when the portrait huffed behind him. Peter joined him at the window, and they watched the muggles in silence for a few seconds.

With a shaking voice, Peter whispered, “What are we going to do?”

“We're going to stand here, until that dick opens the door.” James whispered back.

“What if he never opens the door?” Peter asked.

James sighed, and ran a hand through his hair, “Then I guess we'll die in Padfoot's childhood home.”

“There is a way I could let you out.” The portrait said.

James didn't turn away from the window. He fixed his gaze on a muggle couple holding hands, the woman had red hair like Lily's. He wouldn't get his hopes up. The portrait was just mocking them, there was no way he'd open these doors. So he waited for the portrait to elaborate on his own, he wasn't going to be foolish enough to ask.

Peter didn't have the same idea though, as he begged the portrait for help.

“If you can tell me which famous Slytherin invented the fiendfyre spell, I will let you out.” The portrait explained.

“Fuck that.” James muttered. He aimed his wand over his shoulder, “Silencio.”

He rested his head against the dust-free glass, and settled himself in for a day trapped with an angry portrait and a terrified friend. This was definitely not how he'd planned to spend his summer.


	8. Waiting, Waiting, Waiting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Waiting is boring.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a short chapter, I'm afraid.   
> But the boys are stuck, and there's not much they can do right now besides waiting.

**Sirius**

 

Time didn't exist when you were trapped, that was a fact. It could have been seconds, or minutes, or hours, Sirius couldn't tell. He shook his head slightly, which was resting in Remus's lap. They were stretched out on the dusty floor, aiming their wands at the clothing pile Sirius had created.

“Incendio.” Sirius said.

“Aguamenti.” Remus countered. The jet of water put out the small fire Sirius had started.

“Incendio.”

“Aguamenti.”

“Incendio.”

“Aguamenti.” 

“CONFRINGO!” Sirius shouted.

The clothing pile exploded, sending pieces of fabric fluttering over them and the room. It smelt like burning hair. They had been systematically setting fire to the clothes and then putting it out for forever. Now the game was over, Remus let his wand drop to the floor. He lay down and sighed. Sirius sighed too.

* * *

 

**Peter**

 

“I'm hungry.” Peter whined. He sat in the corner of the room, drawing small circles in the dust.

“Yes, you've said that.” James said. He was draped across the armchair, locked in a furious staring competition with the portrait.

“But I'm hungrier now than I was.” Peter explained.

He glanced out the window, the sun had moved across the sky, and was no longer streaming into the room. He had no idea how long they'd been trapped, but his stomach was rumbling angrily, so it must have been a long time. Broken pieces of wood were scattered across the floor, from James's earlier rampage.

“Maybe if this dick would let us out.” James muttered.

“Not until you've told me which famous Slytherin invented the fiendfyre spell.” The portrait said.

He wasn't hungry, or bored, or insanely furious. He was having the time of his life. Which was unsurprising, considering he'd been under a sheet for Merlin knows how long.

“Hm, was it your mum?” James asked.

“You've said that six times now.” Cetus snapped.

“I know.” James whispered.

“Why don't we just send a letter to someone. James, do you have your owl?” Peter asked. He was grasping at straws, he couldn't think of a good plan because he was so hungry. He needed to eat, anything at all would do.

“Oh yeah, sure, just let me...” James stuffed his hands into his pockets, and then looked at Peter, “Oh no wait a minute, I don't keep my owl in MY FUCKING POCKET!”

“There's no need to shout!” Peter shouted back.

“I think there's all the need to shout!”

“Just tell me which famous Slytherin invented the fiendfyre spell, and stop yelling like children!” Cetus ordered, cutting into their argument.

“Your mum.” James responded, settling down and glowering into the corner of the room.

“Seven times.” The portrait muttered.

* * *

 

**Remus**

 

Five o'clock, Remus guessed. He didn't have any reasoning behind guessing five o'clock, besides the fact that it felt like they'd been sat here for six hours, and the sun had disappeared behind some cloud. Sirius smacked his lips together annoyingly.

Remus rolled over on the bed and shut his eyes. Maybe he could sleep. If he slept, when he woke up, they might be free. Or maybe they'd still be trapped. Trapped here forever, starving and scared.

Good times.

“I'm bored.” Sirius complained.

“Yeah, me too.”

“Then let's do something.”

“Like?” Remus mumbled.

“We could... uh... erm... let's just.... I got nothing.” Sirius said from somewhere in the room.

* * *

 

**James**

 

“Erm, chair?” Peter offered.

James shook his head. The portrait didn't look at them. James had hit him with another silencing charm, after he'd started talking about the achievements of Slytherins. Cetus had decided to ignore them until his voice came back, choosing to keep his back to them, while they played  _I spy._

“Cobwebs?”

“No.”

“Church?”

“Tell me where exactly you see a church.” James said, narrowing his eyes at Peter.

“I don't know, there might be one outside.”

“No.” James said, resting his head in his hand.

“Cloak?”

“No.”

“Colours?”

“No.”

“I give up.”

“Cock.” James answered, looking at Cetus smugly. The man turned around and glared at James, but James wasn't fazed. He was the picture of apathy, as Peter began humming and looking around the room for something to 'spy'.

 


	9. When Pets Become Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hoop jumping, drooling, blushing

**Remus**

 

The sun had officially set, leaving Sirius and Remus in a candlelit bedroom – as if Remus's luck could get any worse. Although, he wasn't exactly thinking romantic thoughts about Sirius at this exact moment. He flicked his wand, and another ghostly, blue hoop appeared in the room.

Sirius, in his animagus form, skidded as he turned around and ran towards the hoop, his tail wagging excitedly. He leapt through it and Remus cheered as the hoop disappeared. He flicked his wand again and another hoop appeared, this time higher. Padfoot paused, took a few steps back and whined at Remus.

“Nope, you can do it.” Remus said.

Padfoot whined again, his ears pulling backwards. Remus laughed, Padfoot had the best puppy-dog eyes. Only Remus was immune to them now, “Come on, don't be such a scaredy cat.”

Padfoot barked, and looked back at the hoop. He ran forward, his claws clicking on the wooden floor, and leapt for the hoop. He only just made it, his tail threatening to break the hoop. He landed with a clatter, and skidded to a stop near the wall. He wagged his tail at Remus and Remus laughed.

“Another?” Remus asked. Padfoot barked in response.

Remus aimed his wand and flicked it again, this time creating four hoops in a line. Padfoot tilted his head in confusion at Remus.

Remus shrugged, “Got to keep it interesting.”

Padfoot tilted his head this way and that to look at the hoops. Eventually he backed himself up against the wall and set off at a run. He leapt through the first hoop, landed safely and leapt through the second hoop. He almost tripped after the third hoop, but managed to catch himself and make it through the fourth hoop.

Remus vanished the hoops with his wand, and rubbed his eyes. He was tired and hungry, and stretched out across the bed that he'd recently cleaned. The entire room was dust-free thanks to Remus and his boredom.

Padfoot trotted around the room, sniffing every piece of destroyed clothing he found. He eventually found a piece of the pink dress he'd offered to Remus before. He scooped it into his mouth and dropped it near the bed. Remus laughed, and picked up the slightly wet piece of fabric.

“Thanks, but I'm sure I said I'd prefer yellow.” Remus said.

Padfoot whined again and leapt onto the bed. Remus lay down and dropped the dress piece to the floor. He had a dry mouth, and the slight throbbing of a headache growing in his temples, from his thirst. Padfoot stretched across Remus's legs, feeling like a warm, extra heavy blanket. He drooled on Remus's trousers.

“Sirius, you're drooling.” Remus complained, shuffling his legs and trying to get free.

Padfoot whined again and stood up. He padded over Remus's legs and walked up his body, careful not to step on any important body parts. Remus covered his face when Sirius stood over him, drooling rather excessively.

“Ew! Stop it!” Remus ordered.

If dogs could laugh, Padfoot would have been, as he licked at the backs of Remus's hands. Remus moved one hand from his face and swatted softly at the dog's head, “You're so gross.”

Padfoot let out a bark, which sounded vaguely like a laugh and settled across Remus's body. He wagged his tail as Remus struggled to breath. Padfoot rested his heavy head on Remus's face and Remus laughed breathily, “I hate you so much.”

He smelt like fur and dog, and a bit like the woods. Remus didn't mind being underneath this heavy creature. Sirius was constantly warm, but he was warmer when he had fur. His dog body was a good shelter from the icy chill that had arrived after the sun had gone. 

Padfoot stood up again, and tilted his head and let out a long whine. Remus rolled his eyes, “I don't really hate you, you dumb animal.”

Padfoot transformed back to human Sirius, and smiled, “Good.”

Remus was breathless for a different reason now. When Sirius had been on top of him as a dog, it hadn't been weird. Kind of like a pet and owner situation. Except now, Sirius was human again, and he was still braced over Remus. His arms on either side of him were like a cage, keeping Remus pinned beneath him.

The smell of firewhiskey and pumpkin juice was on human Sirius, and Remus couldn't help but breathe it in. From this angle, Remus could see how long Sirius's eyelashes were, how dark they were. His clear grey eyes were searching for something in Remus's face. They traced every tiny detail, from his eyes to his lips, and he felt his heart speed up.

Remus was shadowed beneath Sirius, the candlelight glinted off Sirius's necklace. Remus felt safe beneath Sirius, he felt warm and untouchable. He wanted to stay here forever, on this bed, underneath his friend.

Sirius's hair had fallen in front of his face, and Remus wanted to reach up and tuck it behind his ears. No, he wanted to reach up and run his hands through it roughly. He wanted to grab a handful of it, while Sirius kissed his neck. They weren't touching anywhere, but Remus wanted to be. He craved the feeling of Sirius pressed against him, feeling his body beneath his clothes.

Sirius licked his lips, Remus wanted to kiss them so badly. They were pink and soft looking. He wanted – needed – to feel the curve of Sirius's lips when he whispered his name. He needed to hear Sirius moan his name and kiss him hard. He wanted-

“Are we interrupting?” A familiar voice rang out, breaking the intimate air in the room.

Sirius clambered off Remus so fast it was almost like he was never there. Remus sat up slowly. He tried to contort his face into something, anything, that could hide his thoughts.

He managed a confused smile, “How did you get here?”

James and Peter jumped down from a tunnel in the wall. Remus watched the gilded frame swing closed behind them, and a painting of a man now filled it's once empty background. Of course, Remus realised, it was a magical painting not an empty one. He should have guessed that.

The man nodded once to James and Peter, who saluted back, before he disappeared out the edge of the frame.

“We met Cetus Black.” Peter said.

“Who now?” Sirius asked, leaning casually against the wall.

He didn't look like Remus felt. He looked calm, collected, the complete opposite to the mess of feelings running through Remus's chest. His body was lean and his hair had a dishevelled look to it. Merlin, Remus want to run his hands through it.

Torture. It was absolute torture.

“A long dead relative of yours.” James explained bringing Remus back to the present. James ran a hand through his hair, making it stick out. He looked tired, but happy to be free, “He agreed to let us all out if we stopped casting silencing charms on him.”

“What?” Remus asked, still not entirely sure what was going on. It could be because it made absolutely no sense, or it could be because, seconds ago, Sirius had been on top of him, who knows.

“Nevermind, let's just go eat.” James said. He tugged on the door and to everyone's palpable relief, it opened.

Remus clambered off the bed and walked out the door. Sirius walked next to him but neither said anything to the other. It was going to be weird between them for a while, Remus anticipated. He could still feel the heat radiating off Sirius, he was like a walking space heater. Remus clenched his cold hands, and scolded himself mentally.

Once in the kitchen, and surrounded by yet another buffet of food, nearly all thoughts of Sirius's body had left Remus's mind. He was too busy filling his empty stomach, and judging by the silence in the room, filled only with the sounds of chewing, everyone else had the same idea.

Peter really was a great cook, and before long all the food on the table had disappeared. Remus had had a wolf's appetite, but for once, he wasn't the only one.

The four of them sat, stuffed and content. James yawned, Sirius sighed, Peter licked his lips, and Remus rubbed a hand across his face. They were glad to be free, but even more glad to be eating.

“So that was...” Sirius began. 

“Interesting?” James offered.

“Yeah, what happened again?” Sirius asked, sipping his pumpkin juice.

James sighed, “I told you, your long dead relative Cetus Black was bored, and decided to trap us in his room so we had to talk to him. Only he wasn't exactly a thrilling conversationalist, and I kept silencing him. He got angry and said that if I promised to never silence him again, he'd let us out. So I did.”

“Right... Sure...” Remus said, “And no one else finds that weird?”

“Not that weird.” Peter said.

“What were you two doing when we came in?” James asked, and Remus almost choked. _James knew._

Luckily, Sirius was as calm as ever, “I was annoying him in dog-form and he told me he hated me.”

James seemed to find that an acceptable answer, and stretched his arms high above his head, his joints popping. Remus hoped his cheeks weren't tinged pink, and glanced at Sirius. He wasn't looking at him, he was focused on his juice bottle, idly picking at the label. He'd tucked one side of his hair behind his ear, like Remus had wanted to do.

Remus wasn't sure if he should be disappointed that Sirius wasn't bothered by the bed-moment, or relieved that their friendship wasn't ruined. He settled on being relieved. The idea of him ever actually confronting his feelings for Sirius was terrifying. It wouldn't work out for either of them.

 


	10. The L Word

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys play Quidditch.   
> Sirius asks a very serious question while he's naked.

**James**

 

James felt the first drop of rain on his cheek. Clouds had blanketed the sky a while ago, and they were just beginning to release their water. He knew he should fly down, he should tell the others it was time to go in, but he was having so much fun, he decided against it.

After yesterday's  _Cetus_ _incident,_ as they were now calling it, they all needed some fresh air. Even if it rained on them, and they got caked in mud, they wouldn't mind. It would be just like old times.

James flew downwards at lightning speed. His hair flew about his head, and his glasses almost slipped from his nose. He breathed in the whizzing air, and felt a thrill of freedom run down his spine. There was nothing,  _nothing,_ that could compare to the freedom one feels on a broom. All his cares about Lily, about Sirius's family life, about Remus's transformation this Friday, were left behind him in the sky. He shot past Remus, past Peter, leaving them both behind him.

The Quaffle was positioned underneath his arm, and as he shot over to Sirius, he dislodged it and held it in his left hand. Sirius angled his broom, and wiggled one hand at James, urging him to make his move. James stared back, this would be revenge for Animal Wars, he would beat Sirius and Peter, even with Remus on his team.

There were only four of them, so they'd had to make do without Beaters or a Seeker. They were all just Chasers or Keepers. Remus was his Keeper, since James played Chaser in Hogwarts. Peter was Sirius's Chaser, and he was sub-par to say the least. But Sirius had a knack for keeping, he had a keen sense of predicting people's moves. James put it down to the dog in him.

Another drop of water hit James, it slid down his hair line and down his cheek. He didn't wipe it away. He fixed his grip on his broom with one hand, and as quick as possible, shot forward. Sirius overestimated which way James would go, and was at the left hoop when James launched at the right. The Quaffle went in, James winked, Sirius glared, Remus cheered.

“What's that then?” James shouted to Sirius, “Three hundred to none?”

“One hundred to fifty, you arrogant prick.” Sirius shouted back.

“Such language!” James shouted in mock horror, just as the heavens opened and rain began to fall in sheets. It was like someone was wringing out a wet towel above them, large droplets of water smacked into James. All four of them flew back down to the ground.

James dismounted into a muddy puddle. He grimaced. Sirius wrapped an arm around his shoulders and they followed Remus and Peter into the house. Sirius had a habit of wrapping an arm around people's shoulders, apparently forgetting that he was only just taller than Peter, and even then only by a few inches. James shook out of Sirius's grasp and ruffled his wet hair, sending water droplets flying.

“Don't feel bad, Padfoot, I'm a professional.”

“Professional arse.” Sirius muttered.

“What was that?”

“Nothing, oh modest Prongs.” Sirius replied with an angelic grin. He nudged his elbow into James's ribs, and ran for the house.

At the fence that bordered his neighbours backyard, since Twelve Grimmauld Place had no use for a garden, he offered a boost for Remus and Peter, who jumped over the fence clumsily, then clambered up himself. James jogged over to the fence, splashing muddy water across his trousers and feeling the rain soak through his thin t-shirt.

It was more difficult to get up than expected, his trainers couldn't get any grip on the soggy wood. He managed to shove the toe of his foot into a gap in the panelling, and heave himself up. It was a good thing he had a lot of upper body strength, thanks to his years of being a chaser, otherwise he'd be trapped there forever.

He landed in the wet grass and almost slipped. Sirius disappeared through the gate and James jogged to catch up. A crack of lightning shot through the dark sky. If the weather had stayed nice, it would have been the perfect day. Waking up somewhere around noon, and spending the afternoon playing Quidditch – and completely owning everyone else at Quidditch – before returning to the house and eating his weight in chocolate. Only, the weather had ruined it, because now he'd have to get changed and wrap up well so he didn't catch a cold.

He veered off into the lounge he called a bedroom, when he entered the house, adding to the tracks of muddy footprints in the hallway. He pointed his wand at his suitcase and it unzipped itself. He began stripping off his wet clothes, as the clothes in his trunk arranged themselves on the sofa. He found his towel and dabbed himself down, before pulling on a new pair of jeans and a jumper. He was cold now, and tired, as he traipsed into the lounge next to his. The one with the large fireplace.

He found Sirius and Remus sat in front of it, and Peter sat on the sofa nearby, curled under a blanket. Remus was leaning his chin on his knees, facing the fire. Sirius had his bare feet stretched out towards the flames, wiggling his toes to get some feeling back into them. He had his hair tied up and James scoffed.

He dropped himself down between Sirius and Remus and held his hands out towards the heat, feeling them begin to warm up instantly.

“Looks like you're getting your thunder, Moony.” James said.

“I already apologised for the nosedive, but Moony still won't let me share his bed.” Sirius pouted.

“I sleep on a couch, you have a bed. Why would you possibly want to share mine?” Remus asked.

“Because... I like sleeping with you.” James, Remus, and Peter laughed together and Sirius pouted even more, “What are you laughing at?”

“You're not sharing with him because you like sleeping with him, you're sharing because you're a baby who's scared of the weather.” James mocked, nudging Sirius's shoulder.

“At least I'm not scared of a _girl._ ” Sirius snapped.

“Except you're as scared of Evans as much as Prongs is.” Moony interjected.

“You're scared of the moon!” Sirius shot back.

“I'm not scared of the moon, I'm scared of what it entails.” Remus explained, glowering at Sirius.

“Heights, then.” James corrected.

“Perfectly acceptable fear. You can die from heights, you can't die from the weather.”

“What if you get struck by lightning?” Peter asked. James turned and nodded at him approvingly.

“Cats.” Remus said in response, aiming his wand at the fire. It flickered, sparked, and then brightened. James shook out his wet hair and lowered his head, aiming the majority of the heat at his scalp.

“I'm a rat, cats are terrifying to me.” Peter whined.

“Aw, is wittle Peter scared of a pussycat?” James mocked.

“Scared of pussy more like.” Sirius muttered.

Peter's hex hit him in the shoulder, and he grimaced grasping at his arm. From the colour of the spell, and the grimace on Sirius's face, James guessed it was a prickle curse. Sirius probably felt like his shoulder was being attacked by a cactus right now.

Sirius, one hand still pressed to his shoulder, waved his wand, “Accio firewhiskey.”

A bottle appeared from behind the sofa and floated into his hands. He unscrewed the cap, it was a fresh bottle. He took a few mouthfuls, and handed it off to James without a word.

James didn't bother to wipe the bottle neck and took a few mouthfuls himself. It was warmer than hot chocolate, and filled him with a sense of happiness. He handed it to Remus, who copied them and chucked it behind to Peter. It went round like this for a some time, while they warmed up.

********

James blinked his eyes open as the door to his room creaked open. It was dark in his room, and the light from the hallway streamed in, casting a shadow of his visitor on the wall. He twisted in his sleeping bag and faced the door. He should probably worry about who was entering his room in the middle of the night, but he was too tired.

Plus, the shadow was clearly Sirius's. So, when Sirius eventually stepped into the room, he wasn't at all surprised.

The thunder boomed outside, and his room was briefly lit up by lightning. The storm had come out of nowhere, but from the sounds of it, it was here to stay. Sirius crept over to the sofa James was stretched out on.

“You're not sharing my bed, Padfoot.” James whispered into the darkness.

“I have to talk to you though.” Sirius paused, and added, “It's important.”

James shut his eyes, and sighed, “It's the middle of the night, talk to me tomorrow.”

“It can't wait.” Sirius whispered back, crouching near James's head.

“Unless you are actually, _literally,_ dying right now, go away.” James was not a morning person. He was not a middle of the night person either. In fact, he was a never-ever-wake-me-up-ever person. Sirius knew this, thanks to James's knack for silencing charms and sharing a dorm for the past five years.

“I am dying... dying to get into bed with you.” Sirius whispered.

James shifted in his sleeping bag, and opened one eye at Sirius. He couldn't really see him, just the silhouette of his head. He could tell he was staring though. James asked, “What?”

“Just let me in.” Sirius ordered, unzipping James's sleeping bag. James groaned in annoyance but didn't resist. He'd discovered long ago that Sirius was a stubborn arse.

There was barely enough room on the sofa for James's long frame, and Sirius was practically hanging off the edge. He was boiling as usual, like walking lava, and James felt instantly uncomfortable. Then Sirius wiggled infuriatingly, and produced his boxers from out of the sleeping bag, chucking them to the ground.

James let out a grunt of disgust, “What have I told you about clothes in my bed?”

“Unless you're Lily Evans, you keep them on at all times.” Sirius quoted correctly, “But I can't sleep in my underwear, and it's too hot, so shut up and deal.”

“I hate you, go to sleep.” James said, vowing to keep his hands firmly on his chest, and his body angled away from Sirius, lest any part of Sirius's naked body touch him.

“But I need to talk.” Sirius whined again. James didn't reply, keeping his eyes shut firmly, and Sirius took this as his cue. “Have you ever been in love?”

James paused, his eyes opening in alarm. That was definitely not what he had been expecting. He had expected an annoying snoring dog-boy next to him, or a conversation about Sirius's family – which James had decided to leave alone for a while, in case he pushed Sirius too far, and ended up in an argument. He had not expected to talk about _love._ Sure, he and Sirius had talked about girls, but never really _love._

“...Is this why you wanted to share a bed with me? You're in love with me?” James teased.

“No, c'mon. But have you?” Sirius sounded so sincere, it kind of weirded James out.

It took him off guard, and he told the complete and honest truth, “Yeah. Lily.”

“You love her?”

“Yes.”

“How do you know?”

“Well, it's...” James paused. How did he know? Well the truth was, he realised, he didn't know. He just felt like he knew.

Which was probably not the answer Sirius was looking for, although James didn't really know what Sirius was looking for. He sighed, and turned his head to look at his friend. He still couldn't see his face, but he was facing the ceiling.

James sighed again, “Are you asking me to tell you about my feelings for Lily?”

Sirius nodded, and James continued, “After you've told me repeatedly, for years, to shut up and stop being such a soppy git.”

James was sure Sirius grinned when he nodded a second time. James turned back to face the ceiling too. Sirius was pressed up against him in the single person sleeping bag, and it was massively uncomfortable. The conversation made James think twice about kicking Sirius out though, there was clearly something on his mind. Maybe if James helped Sirius, he'd get to sleep before the sun came up.

“I don't know how I know, I just do.” James said.

“That's wildly unhelpful.” 

“It's true though. She means everything to me. If I master a new spell, or score in Quidditch, or think of a new prank idea, she's the first person I want to tell. Not you guys, just her... even though she scarcely appreciates my pranking prowess.” Sirius and James laughed softly, and James continued, “I want to make her happy, and if I ever say something to upset her... and Merlin knows I have, it'll fill me with guilt until she... if she ever were to forgive me.”

Silence filled the room again, both of them lost in their own thoughts. James missed Lily. He missed her with his entire being. He could distract himself with two-on-two Quidditch, or trashing Slytherin heirlooms, but when he ended up in bed, surrounded by darkness, she was the only thing on his mind. In his dreams, she was still mad at him.

Maybe she'd be mad at him forever.

Maybe he'd fucked up so badly, she'd never want him back.

Maybe his life was over.

“Remember when her and her dorm-mates all caught Dragon Pox? And they were all quarantined?” James asked suddenly. Sirius nodded next to him and he continued, “Well, I'm probably only admitting this because I'm sleep deprived and it's the middle of the fucking night! But, I used to sneak to the Hospital Wing at night and sleep outside the doors, because I couldn't sleep knowing she was far away from me.”

Silence fell again, and James waited for Sirius to say something. After a long, pregnant pause, he whispered, “I was right, you are a soppy git.”

James punched Sirius in the arm, eliciting a hiss of pain from his friend. He laughed, “Look, whoever you're thinking about, you liked them enough to listen to me talk about Lily, so...”

“Yeah.” Sirius said, sounding thoughtful.

“Now, get out of my bed, before I start waxing poetic about her eyelashes!” James ordered.

Sirius almost fell off the couch trying to extract himself from James's sleeping bag. James shut his eyes as soon as the bag was zipped back up without Sirius inside. Maybe he'd be able to get some sleep before sunrise. 


	11. The Hypothetical B Word

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius annoys James, and takes his own anger out on jellybeans,

**Sirius**

 

Sirius paused with his hand on the door handle, James gave a sleepy sigh behind him. Sirius had gotten the answer to his question, James was currently in love. Or at least feeling the most love he'd experienced so far. But strangely, it had opened more questions than it had closed.

Sirius felt the cool metal beneath his warm hand. He'd put his boxer briefs back on, and had been intending to go to his own bed, but another rather important question was threatening to keep him up all night. Now he was here, he might as well ask.

“James?”

“James isn't here, please go find Remus or Peter.” James muffled into his pillow. Sirius crossed the room again and unzipped James's sleeping bag without waiting for permission. He slid in, balancing on the very edge of the sofa, and zipped the bag up, keeping his boxers on this time.

“So hypothetically, imagine I had a crush on a guy.” Sirius said.

James didn't shift at this random statement, he merely replied, rather grumpily Sirius might add, “Imagine, hypothetically, I sew your mouth closed.” 

Sirius continued as though James hadn't spoken, “Not all guys, just this one guy. I mean, yeah, some guys are fit, but all guys check out other guys, right?”

That got James's attention, and he rolled to face Sirius. His face was shadowed in darkness, but Sirius kept his eyes focused on the ceiling anyway, he didn't really want to see James's reaction to this. It was big news and if James didn't accept it... Sirius didn't know what he'd do. He hadn't spent much of his life thinking about consequences, this was all new to him.

“Uh... no.” James answered.

“No?”

“No.”

“Oh.” Sirius said, feeling even more questions float in his head. His mind was a bubbling cauldron of questions, and he couldn't think of any one to focus on. So he continued on the tangent he'd started, maybe he'd answer his questions along the way, “Right whatever. I have a crush on a guy, but that's not gay, right?”

“No, Sirius, I'm pretty sure that's gay.” James didn't sound judgemental. Sirius still couldn't look at him.

“It is?”

“Yeah.”

Sirius nodded a few times, that answered one question. Or did it?

“Right, so hypothetically, and this is all hypothetical, right? _Hypothetically,_ I like boys but I also like girls. And I've done stuff with girls, but I've never done stuff with boys... But I, hypothetically, want to. Is that gay?”

“Well, no, that's bisexuality.”

“That's a thing?”

“Yup.” The 'p' popped loudly in the silence of the room. James didn't sound judgemental or disgusted at Sirius's hypothetical situations. He sounded tired mostly, but also interested. He really was the best friend anyone could ask for.

“How do you know all this _?”_ Sirius asked into the darkness.

James stifled his yawn, “How do you not?”

“I'm from a pure-blooded, incredibly bigoted, conservative family. Do you really think I was taught about boys liking boys and girls liking girls?”

“Fair point.” James said, this time unable to hold in his yawn.

Sirius wiggled out of the sleeping bag, allowing James to sleep. He was grumpy when he didn't get eight hours of sleep. Frankly, Sirius didn't feel like listening to a grumpy James whine about his sleep all week.

Sirius was halfway across the room, when he paused again, “Hey Prongs?”

“What.” James said, it wasn't quite the question it should have been. It sounded more like a warning. Sirius smiled, he so loved to annoy James.

“I think I'm bisexual.” Sirius confessed.

“That's great Sirius, now  _go the fuck to sleep!_ ” James snapped, and Sirius left the room, snickering to himself.

Sirius walked into the kitchen. There was no way he was going to get to sleep with all these questions fizzing about his mind. So he boiled the kettle and located an unopened packet of jellybeans. Once his coffee was done, and he'd arranged all the nice looking jelly beans on the table, he sat down.

Where to begin with the information James had just given him?

First off, he was bi. This he knew. This he had no doubt whatsoever. He was attracted to girls and, now that he thought about it, he'd always been attracted to boys too. James's comment about not checking out other boys had opened his eyes, he was bisexual, and he was surprisingly okay with it.

James was in love, that was true too. Sirius wasn't sure if what he felt was love, or just a crush. He couldn't really tell. He felt more about this guy than he had about the last girl he dated. But then, he'd really only dated her for fun, and this guy had been his friend for years. He'd seen him naked, and carried him back to the hospital wing. He'd been wrapped in his arms on more than one occasion, the most recent being when he'd taken a nosedive to frighten the crap out of him.

He'd shared a bed with Remus, and bought sweets for him on full moon days. He'd begged to copy his homework, watched him read on his bed, and laughed for hours with him. But was that love? Wasn't that just friendship? He'd done half of those things for James and Peter anyway, but it had always felt different.

Sirius shifted in his chair and popped a jellybean in his mouth. It was vanilla ice cream flavored. As he chewed, he thought some more about Remus, and whether confronting these feelings would ever actually work...

He thought of Remus bundled up in the winter, the cold turning his nose pink and his breath coming out in fog as he laughed.

He thought of Remus in the bed next to him during a thunderstorm, warm and solid and safe. Not saying anything when Sirius reaches for his hand and entwines their fingers, and not mentioning Sirius's moment of weakness the next morning.

He thought of Remus after a full moon, weak and exhausted. Yawning on every second word and resting his head on Sirius's shoulder, promising he was just resting his eyes.

He hadn't even known he'd had feelings for him until that stupid Cetus incident. All of this was Cetus's fault. If he hadn't trapped them in the bedroom for hours, Sirius wouldn't have ended up on top of Remus, transforming back to human at the worst possible moment. He wouldn't have felt Remus beneath him, seen him from that angle. He wouldn't have been forced to think about kissing his skin, or the smell of peppermint that followed him around, or the look in his eyes when Sirius licked his lips.

Dammit.

None of this mattered! Sirius realised angrily, throwing an orange jellybean at the wall. Because he could offer nothing to Remus! Remus was better than him, he always bloody would be. He was going to go get high grades in all his NEWTs, and go on to become some famous wizard who eradicates anti-werewolf legislation, and Sirius was going to be a layabout with sub-par NEWTs, and no home or job.

All he could offer was a pretty face and an endless supply of Honeydukes, both of which, Moony already had. Sirius tossed another jellybean into his mouth – grass flavoured – and looked out the window. The moon was almost full, just three nights to go until Remus's transformation. Sirius would have to see him naked again, he would have to carry him to his bed, and hear that little whine he lets out  _every single time_ Sirius lets go of him. It would be torture.

Sirius couldn't do anything about his feelings, because Remus would never go for a guy like him. He went for guys like Davidson and Copeland. Boys who brushed their neatly trimmed hair, and tucked their shirts in. Boys who were prefects like Remus and genuinely studied hard for exams. Boys who even  _Remus_ had had more detentions than.

Remus would never go for a boy like Sirius.

But then...

If Remus didn't want him, why had he looked so eager? Why had he mirrored every expression on every girl's face when Sirius had been on top of them too? He had looked like he was seconds away from arching his hips upwards, like he was dying for contact.

He had looked incredibly hot.

Sirius let his head drop onto the cool wood of the dining table. He was in deep, and something had to give. Hopefully, it wouldn't be his friendship with Moony. 


	12. Impatience

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius makes breakfast, James is confused, Remus becomes impatient.

**Remus**

 

The full moon was coming, Remus could feel it. He woke up Wednesday morning with creaking bones and a rumbling stomach. A tingling ache ran all over his body, and it had nothing to do with the lengthy Quidditch match from yesterday. He stretched and groaned, burying his face in his blanket. He'd dreamt about Sirius, like every night this week. Sirius had been on top of him again, but unlike in reality, he had not been wearing clothes.

Remus sighed happily, and the smell of bacon caught his nose. His stomach ordered him out of bed. He folded his blanket neatly and followed the smell to the kitchen. Why was Peter up so early and making bacon? Usually he wasn't seen until ten, along with Sirius. It would be another two hours before any of them would see James.

When Remus opened the door, he didn't find Peter. He found Sirius, stood next to a frying pan, whistling some random tune. Remus rubbed his eyes rather dramatically. Why was Sirius up so early? And since when did he know how to cook?

He glanced around the kitchen to see if anyone else was up, maybe he'd missed some kind of memo about waking up early. No one was there, it was just Sirius.

Shirtless Sirius, to be exact.

Remus couldn't help but admire the architecture of Sirius's back. His hair was flicking out at the ends, and brushing against his bare shoulders. Remus felt the overwhelming urge to wrap his arms around Sirius, and pressed his lips to his shoulder blades. Sirius was wearing drawstring pants that hung off his hips, and it was unbearable.

Remus eventually managed to drag his eyes away, scolding his lack of control – which he seemed to be doing more frequently than usual – and scraped a chair across the floor, flopping into the seat.

Sirius turned and smiled at him, “Morning Moonbeam.”

“Morning.” Remus said, oblivious to the nickname. He was too busy admiring the neat line of dark hair that trailed from Sirius's bellybutton into his pants. Remus wanted to follow it with his mouth. Then he realised what he'd thought and focused his attention on the table. Sirius started whistling again.

“Why are you up so early?” Remus asked, trying to slow down his racing heart.

“I didn't sleep.” Sirius said, sounding far too perky for someone who hadn't slept in twenty four hours.

“How come?” Remus asked, he stood up and boiled the kettle.

He poured away the cold coffee in Sirius's mug and grabbed another one from the cupboard. He put a spoonful of instant coffee into one mug, and a tea bag into the other. Sirius didn't look like he needed coffee. In fact, he looked like he'd had a caffeine overdose. Remus still made him one. Sirius accepted it gratefully, and one-handedly shared the food in his frying pan between two plates.

Remus carried his towards the table and Sirius followed. They sat down next to each other and Remus dug in. His stomach was ordering him to eat faster and eat more before the transformation, even though he had two whole days until he did. He was half an egg and a sausage away from finishing when he swallowed, and paused. He glanced to his left.

Sirius was staring at him. He was leaning his elbow on the table, completely ignoring his food, and staring at him. Remus felt heat in his cheeks and guessed he was blushing, “You're staring rather intensely.”

It came out more breathily than he intended.

_Merlin, so pathetic._

“Am I?” Sirius asked, one corner of his mouth twitching. His eyes moved down from Remus's face and roamed over his entire body lasciviously. Remus felt even more heat rush up his neck. He was probably beet red right now and Sirius was probably loving embarrassing him.

“Coffee, _now._ ” James commanded, stamping into the kitchen. Sirius's eyes left Remus when James slammed the door shut with an echoing bang. He pushed his untouched plate of food in James's direction.

Sirius fluttered his eyelashes and smiled beautifully, “Yes, my darling.”

“Don't you _my darling_ me, Black!” James snapped, throwing himself into a chair. He looked exhausted and furious, “If you interrupt my sleep one more time, I swear I will cut off a rather important part of your anatomy.”

Sirius laughed and stood up. He flicked the kettle on and waited for it to boil. Rain poured down outside, creating falling shadows on Sirius near the window.

Now he wasn't being observed like some exotic creature, Remus finished his food ravenously. When he was done, ignoring the temptation to lick his plate, he asked, “He interrupted your sleep?”

James opened his mouth to reply, but before he managed to choke out anything more than a 'yes', a boiling hot cup of coffee was thrust into his palm.

Sirius spoke quickly, “I had a nightmare and needed my big, strong Prongs to save me.”

James narrowed his eyes at Sirius. Sirius looked back at him with a weird look on his face, it was gone before Remus could identify it. Remus drew his brows together in confusion and James looked half as confused as he did. Remus had the distinct impression he was missing something.

Finally, James just shook his head and tapped his coffee mug, “Keep 'em coming.”

Sirius smiled at Remus, and sat down. Sirius was acting weird. First he didn't sleep all night, then he cooked, stared at Remus intently, and now shared random looks with James. Remus watched him, and sipped his tea. He sighed to himself, maybe things were weird between them after being trapped in that room, after all.

“What's the plan?” Peter asked, walking into the kitchen and stealing a sausage from James's plate.

“Sleep.” James said, oblivious to the stolen food.

Peter sat down, and frowned at James, “You say that everyday.” 

“You say what's the plan everyday.” James countered.

“Ladies, ladies, no bickering. We'll be trashing Grimmauld Place some more. We have an antiques room.” Sirius waggled his eyebrows and then added, “I'm sure we could make use of the incendio spell.”

“No, no fires, Sirius.” Remus scolded. Sirius frowned at him.

** **** **

There had been fires. Remus had had to push his tingling muscles hard and be an unpaid fire-fighter all day. He was almost glad when James and Peter went to bed at an appropriate hour. _Almost_ glad because Sirius, despite not having slept last night, was still brimming with energy, and it fell to Remus to look after him.

Sirius threw an exploding charm at the cabinet holding a few Slytherin Quidditch medals his relatives had won.

Remus had to create a shield in front of them before they were both impaled. Sirius laughed behind him and Remus had to admit it was pretty funny. Sirius wasn't even drunk but he was exploding everything in the room like he was. He had no control, like a toddler in a toy shop, he was beaming with excitement. Remus liked the look on him.

Sirius looked around the room and saw he'd destroyed every last trophy in the trophy room. Just like he'd destroyed every last antique in the antique room. He frowned and then smiled, “There's still Regulus's room.” 

Remus laughed, “No, Sirius, you should definitely sleep.”

“I'm not tired.” Sirius shrugged.

“You should be though. Come on.” Remus took Sirius's hand and lead him from the room. Sirius's hand was warm and soft, in stark comparison to Remus's rough, cold hands. Sirius didn't seem to mind and Remus was sure he felt his thumb run fondly along his skin, only for a second.

“Moonbeam, are you taking me to bed?”

_I wish._

Remus smiled, a slight heat growing in his cheeks, “You know, I don't think I'm your type.”

“Maybe you're exactly my type.” Sirius countered.

“Maybe you're sleep deprived.”

“Maybe.” Sirius agreed.

Remus stopped on the second floor hallway, near Sirius's bedroom. He didn't want to let go of Sirius's hand. He did anyway. He was sure a flash of disappointment ran along Sirius's face, but it was gone before he could acknowledge it properly.

“Night, Moonbeam.” Sirius grinned.

“Night, Snuffles.”

“Don't call me that!” Sirius ordered.

“Don't call me Moonbeam then.”

“But you are a moonbeam.”

“And you're such a Snuffles. Goodnight, Sirius.” Remus spun on his heels and walked down the stairs. He wanted to leave before he glimpsed Sirius's room, it would only fuel his dreams.

He pressed his ear to James's door and heard his snoring. Two down. He did the same to Peter's door and heard him shuffle in bed. Three down. All of them were asleep, he could sleep now without fear of Animal Wars Round Three stealing Sirius's much needed sleep.

Remus shook out of his t-shirt and his pants. He was too tired to change into his pyjamas. He should have gone to bed with James and Peter, but he'd wanted to watch Sirius explode things some more. The full moon was closer now, and he was dreading this Friday. Even Sirius in drawstring pants couldn't save him, although it did help.

Remus had only just blown out the candle when someone knocked on his door. Remus lay on the couch and pulled his blanket up to his chin, “Go to bed, Snuffles.”

“How did you know it was me?” Sirius asked, poking his head around the door.

“Who else would be up and knocking on my door in the middle of the night?” Remus said.

“Good point.” Sirius said.

He shut the door behind him and cast a ball of fire at the sconce. The room lit up with a golden glow. Sirius sat on Remus's legs and Remus glared at him. He shuffled annoyingly, digging into Remus's shins and finally stilled, “So what's up?”

“Why aren't you in bed?” Remus asked, arching one eyebrow.

“Why aren't  _you_ in bed?” Sirius shot back.

“I am.” 

“Got an answer for everything, haven't you?” Sirius asked with a sigh.

“Sirius, stop being cocky and tell me why you're not in bed.”

“I can't sleep without you.” Sirius smiled, his teeth glowing in the candlelight.

Remus rolled his eyes and wordlessly threw open the blanket. He knew he shouldn't. His imagination was already bad enough, and what if he dreamt about Sirius with Sirius in his bed and Sirius heard? Oh Merlin, that would be bad.

It was too late though. Sirius was already squashed onto the sofa. Remus would have to grin and bare it. Remus shut his eyes and Sirius flicked his wand at the candle, plunging them into darkness.

Remus was actually incredibly comfortable. He was in his underwear, Sirius was in his drawstring pants, so there were only two very thin layers of clothes between them. Sirius was like a space heater under the blanket, and Remus had his icy toes pressed against his skin. Sirius didn't mind, it seemed.

Remus turned so his back was to Sirius, and Sirius turned with him. Remus clenched his teeth. The word torture floated into his mind again. He was curved next to Sirius, fitting against him perfectly, chest to back. It was never normally this intimate when they shared in Hogwarts, mostly because the beds were much larger than the Blacks's tiny couches.

Remus shut his eyes and willed sleep to come. He could feel Sirius's breath on his shoulder. Remus should have expected it, he knew Sirius well and they'd shared a bed many times, but he still tensed when Sirius's arms snaked around his stomach, pulling him closer. Remus smiled to himself.

For someone who acted so cool, Sirius really was a cuddle whore.

Sirius Black: friend, prankster, dog, family disappointment, snuggler.

Remus let out a quiet laugh and Sirius sighed next to him. Remus liked to cuddle Sirius too, he had to admit he never had a better night's sleep than he did when Sirius was next to him. He could feel Sirius's heartbeat through his skin, and his chest rising and falling gently. Despite how close a certain part of Sirius was to him, Remus felt incredibly relaxed.

He was so close to sleep.

“Moonbeam?” Sirius whispered, his breath sending shivers down Remus's spine. Remus hummed in response, too sleepy to speak. Sirius didn't say anything. Remus tensed up when his lips met his shoulder.

“What are you doing?” Remus asked, suddenly awake. His body was on fire, or made of fire, he couldn't tell. It was hot and Sirius was hotter. His right hand ran along Remus's stomach and he kissed his shoulder again. Remus almost choked, his mouth had gone so dry, “Sirius?”

“Yes?”

“What are you doing?”

“I'm kissing your shoulder.”

“I know, but-”

“Then why did you ask?” Sirius whispered. His breath ghosted across his skin, and his lips followed the trail. His lips found the space beneath his ear, “Do you want me to stop?”

“No.” Remus exhaled. He sounded needy. He felt needy.

Sirius's lips found the corner of Remus's jaw, he was leaning over Remus now, and Remus was still half convinced he'd drifted into a dream. Only, his dreams were never as vivid as this. Sirius's lip were never as soft and his hands were never as hot. This wasn't a dream. This was definitely reality. Sirius's hand reached out and turned Remus's head to face him.

Remus rolled onto his back, and looked at Sirius. His eyes had adjusted slightly to the dark, but the majority of Sirius's face was still shadowed. He looked beautiful though, he always would. Sirius leaned down and almost touched Remus's lips. Remus wanted to close the gap, he wanted to lean up and pull Sirius between his legs.

Sirius halted him before he could though. “Tell me you want it.” He breathed.

“Why?”

“Tell me.” Sirius repeated. Remus could see his eyes now, and they sparkled with mischief.

“I want you so badly.” Remus whispered, Sirius kissed the corner of his mouth in reward, “I want you more than I want anything else.” Remus admitted, “I want you with every part of me, I want to pull your pants off with my teeth.”

“Remus Lupin, you have a filthy mouth.” Sirius whispered, his mouth was curved into a smile when it was pressed against his jaw, “Keep going.”

Remus was out of breath as Sirius found his way on top of him. Remus had his legs open and Sirius fit in perfectly, trailing gentle kisses down his neck. Remus's body was frozen, but his mouth wasn't.

“I want to taste your skin.” Remus breathed and Sirius hummed against his neck, “I want to rough my hands through your hair. I need your hands on me, and your lips.”

Sirius obliged, moving one hand up Remus's chest, and the other down behind him. Remus let out a sigh and Sirius's lips paused on his collar bones. He moved back up, and Remus hooked one leg around him, keeping him in place.

Sirius laughed breathily, and moved his lips to Remus's. He stopped, again, before they touched. Remus wanted to grunt in frustration, he needed to kiss him.

“How long?” Sirius asked, bracing his arms on either side of Remus.

“How long what?”

“How long have you wanted this?”

“Longer than you could imagine.” Remus admitted.

Sirius dipped his head and stopped again, barely a breath away. Remus licked his lips, and moved his head, but Sirius pulled away out of reach. Remus groaned in defeat and lay back down. Another infuriating smirk tugged at Sirius's lips, “So impatient.”

“Kiss me before I get bored of you.” Remus ordered.

“Ha! You could never get bored of me!” Sirius grinned and finally,  _finally,_ he leaned down and pressed his lips to Remus's.

It was soft and tender and Remus's hands flew up and ran through Sirius's hair. Sirius's lips were perfect, like the rest of him. One hand ran down Remus's cheek softly, down his neck, his shoulder, and underneath him, pulling him closer. Remus pulled Sirius down on himself harder. Sirius pressed firmly against him, his hips moving gently in time with Remus's.

 


	13. Sirius's First Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's not Sirius's first time okay? 
> 
> James eavesdrops, Remus gets his way, and Sirius enjoys his first time.

**James**

 

James woke up. His mouth was dry and he felt groggy. He was about to scream and hex Sirius, when his senses returned and he realised he was alone. Sirius hadn't come in to wake him up, he'd woken up for no reason. He scrambled out of his sleeping bag angrily, not sure who he should be angry at. He glared at the moon outside and the rain, glared at the candle when he lit it, glared at the door as he walked through.

If anyone crossed his path in the next few minutes, they'd end up dead. James was going to get a drink, and then go back to sleep for the next ten hours and he would not be interrupted. He passed Peter's room and heard his snoring. He crept through the candlelit hallway and froze when he passed Remus's room.

Was that a moan?

Another soft moan floated through the door. Knowing he shouldn't, James crept closer to the door and pressed his ear to it. Another moan met his ears. That was definitely Remus. Why was Remus moaning? Was he...  _oh._

James pressed a hand to his mouth and stifled his laughter. Remus couldn't be blamed for going to town on himself, he was a teenage boy and teenage boys had urges that-

Another moan.

This time it wasn't quite so funny, because this time it wasn't Remus. It was Sirius. James almost stepped back from the door in shock, he kept still though, hoping to hear some kind of explanation. He had heard Sirius moan like that when he was eating a particularly nice slice of chocolate cake.

This didn't mean his two best friends were...

He stared wide-eyed into the darkness. He looked very much like a – and he hated the pun – deer in headlights.

James could hear the sofa squeaking, and the sloppy sounds of kissing and he dreaded to think what else. Sirius was bi... Remus was the guy he wanted to do things with. It was great he was confronting his feelings, but did he need to do it when they were all in the same house? When they could hear. When James was forced to accidentally bare witness to his best friends fucking!

His body had frozen, like he had rigor mortis. He was suddenly struck by the horrible fear of them finding him eavesdropping on their, uh, lovemaking. There were hushed giggles and more moaning.

Sirius's voice suddenly sounded out, “Oh fuck, Moony.”

James grimaced, he could never, ever use that nickname again. Every time anyone called Remus  _Moony,_ he would hear those breathy pants and moans. He blinked a few times, trying to get the image that had formed in his head out. As slowly and as quietly as he could manage, he stepped away from the door, spun on his heels and marched back to his bedroom.

* * *

 

**Remus**

 

Sirius was incredible. Remus was made of fire. He could feel _everything_ through the thin fabric of Sirius's pants, and it was enough to get Remus's heart beating loud enough to hear. Maybe Sirius could hear it too, as he sunk his teeth into Remus's shoulder. Remus let out a moan, feeling out of breath, he sounded like he'd ran a marathon.

Remus was so impossibly happy. Sirius could leave bright red hickeys across his skin, that spelt out “Sirius's Boy” and he really wouldn't mind. His parents probably would, but he wouldn't.

Out of nowhere, Sirius pulled away. Cold air flooded his vacated space and Remus let out a whine. He needed Sirius back, he needed him to fill the empty space... Which was only half the euphemism it sounded like. Sirius was sat back, the blanket hanging loosely around his shoulders. His jaw was clenched and Remus could see a muscle twitching in the candlelight.

“What's wrong?” Remus asked, feeling his happiness drain away. Sirius was regretting this already, and they hadn't even gotten undressed. He could have at least waited to change his mind _after_ Remus had seen him naked.

“I can't do this.” Sirius said, still not looking at Remus.

Remus sighed, “I get it.”

Even though he didn't. Even though he was seconds away from getting everything he had ever wanted. Right now though, Remus wanted to hide, he wanted to curl under his blanket and avoid Sirius for the rest of the week. He folded his arms across his chest.

Sirius turned to stare at him, silently. Quicker than Remus thought possible, he was back. He had Remus's hands pinned down on either side of him, and had found the space between his legs easily.

His lips ghosted against his earlobe, “I don't think you get how much I want to make you scream my name.”

Remus's mouth fell open, and the corner of Sirius's mouth twitched as he moved back to face him. Then he moved away again, and Remus sighed in anger. He was getting tired of Sirius leaving him, he should stay between Remus's legs forever, “Then why aren't you still on top of me?”

“I was trying to decide if I wanted to fuck a half-blood werewolf in front of my prejudiced relatives.” Sirius laughed softly, gesturing to the walls in Remus's bedroom. Remus suddenly remembered he'd been stuck in the room where every inch of the walls were covered in portraits.

He'd had a difficult time sleeping the first night, with the haughty eyes of long-dead Blacks staring him down. He'd gotten used to it, but clearly having sex in front of people who shared his bloodline, was not Sirius's thing.

“And? What did you decide?” Remus asked.

“I can't do it.” Sirius said, standing up. He stretched and Remus felt a blush fill his cheeks when he saw the bulge in Sirius's pants. He couldn't drag his eyes away.

“Okay.” He said.

Sirius would leave and they'd have to do this some other time. Sirius would have to make him scream his name some time in the future. If there was ever a chance. He doubted James and Peter would appreciate Sirius torturing Remus, with his tongue, in the dorm every night. He doubted his parents would appreciate it either.

Sirius left the room and Remus flopped down, fanning some cold air onto his face. There was no way he could sleep now.

Sirius poked back around the door and looked expectantly at Remus, “You coming, then? Or are you busy enjoying the stares of my relatives?”

“What?”

Sirius looked at him like he was an idiot, “I just told you I wanted to make you scream my name. Did you think that was just talk?” 

“Well, I...”

“Come on, Moonbeam, this offer won't last forever.” Sirius sang gently, as he disappeared again.

Remus scrambled up, and caught up to him on the stairs. Sirius held out his hand. He wiggled his fingers when Remus hesitated. Remus took his hand and smiled shyly. They had just shared the most intense make out session ever, and Remus was smiling over holding his hand.

They walked upstairs in silence. After a few steps, where Remus managed to finally convince himself he was actually awake, Sirius asked, “Is this a bad idea?”

“Definitely.” Remus said without hesitation.

After a few more steps, Remus elaborated, “This is the worst idea any of us have ever had. This is worse than that time we released Blast-ended Skrewts into the dungeons. There is no way in hell this is going to work out for either of us.”

“It's all gonna end in tears.” Sirius added.

“And shouting.” Remus said.

“And a hex or two.” Sirius said.

“Or ten.” Remus laughed.

They were silent again as they rounded the second floor corridor. Sirius lead Remus to his bedroom door, he paused before he touched the handle. They both stood frozen, staring blankly at the door, as though they'd forgotten how to use doors. There was something tight wrapped around Remus's chest. This was a terrible idea. This was a huge mistake. Sirius swung their hands gently, and blew air out between his lips.

“So...” He started, “You still wanna do this?”

“Definitely.” Remus said, without hesitation.

They grinned goofily at each other. Sirius shoved the door open and dragged Remus inside.

Remus let go of Sirius's hand and stared at his room. They'd been in Grimmauld Place since Sunday, and they hadn't entered Sirius's room even once. It was not what Remus had been expecting. It was completely, utterly different to the rest of the house. Although, Remus wasn't sure why he had expected anything else.

The walls were painted an off-white colour, so unlike the dark, broody colours that adorned every other room, and even most of Sirius's clothes. He'd probably painted it white to contrast his family.

Which also explained the Gryffindor posters and scarves stuck to the walls. There were photos of himself, and the other Marauders, smiling and waving at the camera, or shoving each other out of the frame. There was even a photo of Lily and James grinning goofily at each other, ignoring the camera. Posters of muggle women in tiny bikinis, and muggle sports teams, that didn't move, lined the walls too.

It was like when Sirius had decorated his room, he'd looked for all the things his parents hated, and stuck them on his walls.

Which was probably true.

Before Remus could take in any more about Sirius's room, he was pinned between the door and Sirius. He laughed softly and Sirius caught his lips. His tongue ran along Remus's bottom lip, and it sent thrills down his spine. Remus had only been with two guys in his life, and one of them happened in second year, so he didn't have much to compare Sirius to. He still reckoned Sirius was the best he was going to get.

Sirius's hand ran down Remus's back and over the curve of his arse. Remus did what he'd always wanted to, and grabbed a handful of Sirius's hair. He pulled on the roots and Sirius let out a breathy moan, that sent electricity shooting through his body. Sirius tasted like toothpaste.

Remus was pulled away from the door, and he stumbled to the bed with Sirius, both trying to keep their lips on each other.

Sirius twisted them both and pushed Remus onto the bed. Remus didn't have time to acknowledge Sirius's bed, because Sirius dug his thumbs into his waistband.

“Wait! Wait, wait.” Remus panted, shuffling to the edge of the bed. Sirius removed his hands from the top of pants, and Remus replaced them quickly, “I want to do it.”

Sirius let out a breathy laugh, and Remus ran his fingers along the waistband. He pulled them downwards, revealing Sirius's black and white striped boxers. Sirius stepped out of his pants. Remus subconsciously licked his lips, and Sirius used his finger to tilt Remus's head up to him. He bent forward and pressed his lips to his, moving forwards until they were lay properly on the bed, in the same position they had been downstairs.

Sirius paused and pulled away,  _again._

“Sirius, if you don't fuck me right n-”

“Patience, Moonbeam. I just want to make sure you're ready to make the biggest mistake of your life.” Sirius said, brushing Remus's hair off his forehead.

Remus propped himself up on his elbows, his chest rising and falling rapidly. Sirius's finger ran down his face, and along his lips. Remus poked his tongue out to meet it and a tiny smile formed on Sirius's face.

As Sirius's finger ran along his jaw, Remus nodded, “Of course, I'm ready.”

Sirius smiled and found Remus's lips again. His hand had just wandered down to Remus's crotch, when he withdrew again. Remus sighed angrily, “For fuck's sake.”

Sirius was bent on torturing him, he was going to make him beg. Remus would happily beg if it would get Sirius to hurry up!

“Wait, this isn't your...” Sirius trailed off.

“My first time?” Remus laughed, “No. Davidson beat you to it, I'm afraid.”

“Ugh,  _fucking Davidson._ ” Sirius glowered.

Remus laughed, “I don't think I need to ask, but it's not yours, right?”

“Technically, no.”

Remus tilted his head, “Technically?”

“Well, you're a boy.”

“Glad you noticed.”

Sirius swatted him gently on the head, “I mean, I've been with girls but I've never...” Sirius trailed off, waving his hand to encompass the end of his sentence. It took Remus a few seconds to get it.

“Oh! It's not really that different.” Remus said, shrugging.

“Really?”

“No, that's a lie.” Remus smiled slightly, when Sirius glared at him, “Don't worry, okay? It's gonna be fun.”

“I'm not  _worried_ .” Sirius said, pouting slightly. He ran a nervous hand through his hair, and Remus smiled to himself. The great Sirius Black was nervous. This was new. This was something Remus was sure he'd never see.

Remus shifted into a sitting position. He pressed his lips to Sirius's neck, and nibbled gently. He marvelled at the space where his dragon tooth necklace hung, hearing Sirius take a sharp intake of breath.

With the hand that wasn't holding him up, he trailed his fingers tenderly down Sirius's chest. They ran down his stomach and Sirius shifted as he was tickled. Remus kept going, catching Sirius's lips with his own. He brushed through the trail of hair that poked out of his underwear. Sirius seemed to melt beneath him, entwining his fingers in the short hair at the nape of Remus's neck.

Remus's hand ran along the bulge in Sirius's underwear, and they both sighed against each other's mouths. Sirius's hand flew down and pressed Remus's hand down firmly. Remus rubbed his hand against the length of Sirius, through the fabric, and Sirius caught Remus's bottom lip with his teeth. He was hard, and so was Remus, he wanted – needed – to fuck Sirius, but at the same time he never wanted this moment to end. He wanted it to last forever.

Sirius removed his hand from Remus's, and traced his fingertips along the inside of his thigh, slowly, softly. His fingers were hot against his skin. Remus's breath caught in his throat as his fingers found his cock through the fabric.

Remus dipped his fingers into Sirius's underwear, his fingertips meeting the bushy, black hair, and wrapped them around Sirius's hard cock. Sirius let out a soft moan that was so beautiful, Remus wanted to hear it again. He wanted to hear it everyday of his life.

He ran his hand along the shaft, and Sirius arched his hips slightly. Without warning, Sirius stopped biting his lips, and pushed him downwards, pinning him to the mattress. Sirius had Remus's wrists pinned above his head, and Remus loved it.

He licked his bruised lips, and admired his view once more. Sirius's lashes were so long and dark, surrounding his grey eyes, which were so full of want and desire, that Remus basically melted under their gaze.

Sirius was braced over him, not touching him anywhere again. This time, Remus wouldn't wait. This time he was brave. He arched his hips upwards, and Sirius released one of his wrists, his hand running over his bedside table in search of something.

Remus wrapped his now free arm around Sirius's shoulder dragging him down. Sirius found what he was looking for, and whispered something unintelligible into Remus's skin.

Remus was about to ask him to repeat what'd he'd said when he felt Sirius's crotch against his own, he felt heat rush up his neck. Really, he thought he'd be over the blushing by now.

“Did you just...” Remus tried to catch his breath, “Did you just magic our clothes away?”

Sirius smiled smugly, “Not my first time, remember?”

Remus let his head drop to the pillow, he found Sirius's wand and pried it from his fingers. He whispered his own spell, one he was sure Sirius wouldn't know. Sirius looked mildly confused when nothing happened, and Remus arched upwards, brushing his lips against his earlobe, “Lube.”

“Oh... _oh._ ” Sirius said, and Remus was glad to see a bit of colour flood Sirius's cheeks.

Remus threw Sirius's wand behind them, and settled under Sirius, spreading his legs. Sirius smiled and arched downwards, his hand, now wandless, moved to direct his cock. Remus twisted strands of Sirius's hair, watching the candlelight flicker on his face. He was truly, impossibly gorgeous. Slightly sweaty and out of breath, a mixture of nerves and excitement, his hair a mess, his lips swollen and red. He was a disaster. He'd never looked better than he did right now.

“Slowly.” Remus breathed, when the head of Sirius's cock pressed against his lubed opening. Sirius's eyes flicked to his, and he pushed his hips forward, slipping the head in. Remus gasped and Sirius's breath sped up.

Remus shifted one leg higher to give him better access, and Sirius held it in place with one hand, brushing small circles against his skin. He pushed inwards, slowly and Remus could feel all of him, filling him up. Sirius moaned, and Remus sighed at the sound. He needed that moan. Sirius pulled out slowly, halfway, and moved back in. Remus rocked his hips in time, moaning himself. He needed more.

“Faster.” Remus moaned, and Sirius obliged. Picking up speed, thrusting his hips harder, going deeper. Sirius grunted and Remus clenched his hands in Sirius's hair tightly, as he hit his prostate with every thrust.

Sirius ducked his head and breathed into Remus's hair, “You're so hot.”

Remus could only moan in response. He removed one hand from Sirius's hair, and wrapped it around his own cock. He ran his hand up and down, in time with Sirius's thrusts.

He didn't care what time it was. Time didn't exist right now. James and Peter downstairs didn't exist. All that existed was Remus, and Sirius, and those damn, gorgeous moans. His lips on his shoulder, Remus's hand in his hair, their hips thrusting in time and moving together. Their hot breath on each other's skin, sweat and saliva, and o _h fuck._

“Oh fuck, Sirius.” Remus whispered. He was close, so close.

Sirius ducked his head again, and crashed their lips together. Their tongues in each other's mouth, tasting each other. Sirius was close too, and he rocked his hips, even faster, moaning loudly into Remus's mouth.

“Oh, Moony.” Sirius breathed, pausing his kissing.

He came inside him. Remus watched him come and he was so beautiful. He was incredibly good looking when he came, and it was enough to make Remus come too, running his hand up and down his shaft as Sirius moved his hips a few more times, slower, milking the last drops from himself.

Remus could hardly breathe as he came across his stomach. That was easily the best orgasm of his life, and judging by the dreamy, satisfied look on his face, Sirius felt the same.

They remained like this for a further few seconds, until Sirius shifted to lie next to him. Remus didn't have his wand, it was still downstairs, and he'd thrown Sirius's wand to the ground. There was no way to clean himself, he'd have to get up.

Or so he thought, until Sirius moved again and his tongue ran along Remus's stomach, warm and wet. It dipped into his bellybutton, as he lapped up Remus's seed and Remus moaned. Once all of it was gone, Sirius pressed his lips to Remus roughly, and Remus could taste himself on his tongue. Sirius pulled away and gave an earsplitting grin.

Remus was sticky and sweaty, and sleepy. He rolled over and nestled into Sirius's arms, breathing in the smell of his skin. Sirius sighed dreamily, and enveloped Remus. They lay in silence for a few seconds, until Remus whispered, “Not bad for your first time.”

“It wasn't my... shut up.” Sirius muttered into Remus's hair. Remus smiled and drifted off to sleep, with the sound of Sirius's heartbeat and breathing as his lullaby.

 


	14. Oblivion Thy Name is Peter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius and Remus are inseparable, James falls in love, Peter is oblivious, and a newcomer arrives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is also known as:   
> Forever is Better than Always

**Sirius**

 

Moony shifted and sighed in his arms. His back was pressed warmly against Sirius's chest. Sirius kept one arm wrapped around his waist, and propped himself up with the other arm. He placed tiny, gentle kisses on Moony's bare shoulder. He couldn't believe last night was real. He had fucked one of his best friends, and it wasn't even mildly weird. Remus felt natural in his arms, he felt like he belonged there. Sirius leaned over him to see his face. He was awake.

“Moony, has anyone ever told you, you have the most perfect arse?”

“Yeah, Davidson.” Remus sighed. His voice was soft with sleep and Sirius thought it was the cutest thing he'd ever heard. He always sounded so tiny and adorable in the mornings. Next to him moaning and coming beneath him, it was Sirius's favourite thing about him.

“Ugh.”  _Fucking Davidson,_ “What a kiss arse.”

“You have no idea how true that is.” Remus breathed, letting his eyes drift closed.

Sirius went back to covering his shoulders in soft kisses, and whispered, “You have a filthy mouth, Moonbeam.”

********

**Peter**

 

When Peter entered the kitchen, Sirius and Remus were nowhere to be found. James was sat at the dining table though, staring wide-eyed at his coffee. Peter greeted him, but he barely looked up. He looked... sick. Maybe he had caught a cold after the Quidditch match, he needed a big breakfast.

“Food?” Peter asked, rooting through the many cupboards in the room.

He found a carton of eggs, and some untouched vegetables. Vegetable omelettes it was. They'd eaten a lot of the sausages and bacon, and Peter knew he'd have to save the remaining ones for Remus tomorrow. Or they'd have to find a shop, otherwise they'd have a very hungry, very angry werewolf boy on their hands.

James hadn't replied to his question, so Peter turned around and waved his ingredients around, “Omelettes.”

James nodded, and settled back to staring at his coffee. Peter shrugged, he was probably just tired or sick. He set about making the omelettes, and heard Sirius and Remus enter. They were giggling about something, but composed themselves enough to say good morning.

“What you cooking, Wormy?” Sirius asked, as he beelined to the kettle. He had an earsplitting grin on his face, completely opposite to the look on James's face.

Peter showed the whisked eggs to his friend, “Omelettes.”

“No sausages?” Sirius asked, looking a tad disappointed.

“Yeah, Sirius loves a good sausage.” Remus beamed from the dining table.

Sirius shot him a look, and Peter drew his eyebrows together. He was half tempted to ask what was going on, but the butter had just melted in frying pan. He shrugged, and carried on cooking.

“So do you. Can't get enough meat, can you?” Sirius asked, pouring boiling water into two mugs.

“I'm a werewolf. We  _need_ it.” Remus said.

Peter glanced at him. His eyes sparkled with something Peter couldn't place. He glanced at James to see if he knew what was going on, but he'd gotten paler. He looked sicker than he had.

“You are pretty needy.” Sirius agreed, carrying Remus's tea and his coffee over to the table. He sat down and grinned at Prongs, “What's up with you, sourpuss?”

“Nothin'” James muttered, barely audible. He couldn't look Sirius or Remus in the eye, he focused on the pan in Peter's hands. Peter was angled slightly around to see them all, while cooking.

“You sure, Prongs?” Moony asked, placing his tea down. He sounded genuinely concerned, “You look really pale. Do you have a cold? I can make you some herbal tea.”

“I'm fine, Moon-” James froze, something flashed behind his eyes. Sirius and Remus exchanged a confused glance, and then looked at Peter for help. Peter shrugged, and James eventually shook his head, “I'm fine, Remus.”

James drank his cold coffee, and stared at the wooden table. Sirius glanced at Remus and mouthed, “ _Remus_ ?”.

Moony shrugged, and sipped his tea again. Peter focused all his attention on the omelettes, oblivious to whatever had happened between the three of them.

Now he could use magic while cooking, he managed to make four omelettes in record time. He served everyone breakfast, with the tension and confusion still floating in the air. He sat down and dug in.

James barely ate his, he kept glancing furtively at Sirius and Remus. The latter were grinning goofily at each other, and whispering things as they ate. Peter ate, pretending he didn't find anything weird about this morning.

He had just popped the last piece of his omelette – delicious, even if he did say so himself – into his mouth, when the kitchen door swung open. All four of them looked up, briefly confused, until Lily Evans appeared in the doorway. Then they all looked perplexed instead.

** **** **

**James**

 

James looked at his friends. They were all looking towards the kitchen door. That was good, they could see her too, he wasn't hallucinating. Still, it couldn't be a good sign that she was here. Not after what he had done. She must have been here to break up with him. He stood up, without really meaning to. She looked at him, and she was so beautiful he had to look away.

He opened his mouth. He had intended to ask what she was doing here, or beg for her forgiveness, but nothing came out. He hadn't said anything, and now he was stood up, staring at her like an idiot. At this point, he would settle for any word in the English language. Even if he just said  _beetroot,_ it would be something.

She waited.

He still didn't say anything.

He was hot and clammy, and why did she have to be so beautiful? Why did she have to look at him so expectantly? He did the only thing he could think of. He walked past her, and left the room. He didn't need to turn around to know she'd followed him. Entering his bedroom for the week, he heard her shut the door behind them. He steeled himself, he could face her. He would face her as she broke up with him, he could do this.

She didn't smile when he looked at her, but he did. He couldn't help it, she was as gorgeous as ever, and all James wanted to do was get down on his knees, hug her waist, and beg her to forgive him. It was pathetic, he knew it.

“Lily, I'm sorry.” He said, the words tumbling out of his mouth. The rain pattered loudly against the window, and he raised his voice to be heard over it, “I should never have said that. Your sister's not a bitch, she's-” 

“She is a bitch!” Lily interrupted.

James's mouth hung open in shock. He had heard Lily swear before, but never so blatantly. Usually it was whispered against his skin, or muttered under breath when she messed up a potion. She was never so clear and loud.

Her mouth twitched slightly at his dopey expression, and he clamped his mouth shut.

“She is a bitch, but she has every right to be.” Lily said, “Imagine you had a magical sibling, while you were a muggle. Imagine watching her get to fly on brooms, and create potions that mimic love, while you have to learn  _maths_ . It's hard for her, she's allowed to hate me.”

She paused, and looked at the couch, the corner of her lips turned downwards. James wanted to hug her, but he resisted. He folded his arms across his chest to stop himself. She had yet to get to the part when she shouted at him, and he didn't want to annoy her more than he already had.

Her eyes flicked back to his, “But you,  _James Potter,_ have no right to say that about her! You don't get to-”

"I know.” James said, rather quietly compared to her shouting.

It was her turn to look dopey. She had been expecting a fight, obviously. She had expected him to yell at her, to stand his ground, no matter how wrong he was, like he used to. But he wasn't that guy anymore. Lily had changed him, for the better.

Of course, he was miles away from actually being humble, but he was closer than ever. He knew he was wrong, and he would accept his punishment even if it was her breaking up with him.

He realised he hadn't said anything for a while, and Lily was looking at him expectantly. He cleared his throat, “I know I shouldn't have said that. No one should ever insult someone else's family... Unless it's Sirius's, because even he would admit they're real dicks.” James glowered at the thought of them, and then remembered Lily was still with him, “My point is, if you want to go back home and never talk to me again, I won't stop you.”

He looked at her, her face was a mask. He couldn't tell what she was thinking, so he continued, “I mean, please don't do that, because I'll miss you more than anything. And I'll probably fail Potions without you.” 

James was sure the corner of her mouth twitched again, only minutely, “No, that's not true. I won't fail Potions, I'll fail  _all_ my exams. I would write  _I miss Lily_ as the answer to every question. So please don't leave me, but, you know, if you want to, I won't stop you.” He added quickly, “And it won't be like when we were kids, I won't follow you around and ask you out everyday. I'll leave you alone.” 

She frowned again, and that sealed it for James. She was leaving. At least she was sad about it, but she was still going to go. He'd fucked up beyond repair, and he deserved to be dumped. He shut his eyes, because he was letting her leave, but that didn't mean he had to watch. He listened to the rain, and waited for the tell tale close of the door.

Only it never came.

He heard her footsteps. He cracked one eye open. She was closer to him, standing inches away, arching one eyebrow at him. She swatted him on the arm, and smiled. That smile. James wanted to stare at it for eternity.

“You're an idiot.” She said softly, still smiling. James smiled back, “Did you really think I would break up with you?”

James nodded, and she whacked him again.

“JAMES POTTER, YOU IDIOT!” She laughed, and he laughed too, “I don't believe you! I wouldn't break up with you over that! I love you, you complete moron, I only came to shout at you for a bit.”

“You love me?” James whispered. He reached out and entwined his fingers with hers, pulling her even closer. He kissed the top of her head, she smelt like flowers. She freed her hands from his and stood on her tiptoes, wrapping her arms around his shoulders.

“Of course I love you.” She whispered back, pressing her lips firmly to his. His heartbeat picked up, he could taste her strawberry lip balm.

James swept her up, and she wrapped her legs around his waist. She tasted like heaven, and strawberries, better than anything James had ever tasted. He wanted to devour her. She tugged on his hair. He lowered her to the couch, and ended up on his knees in front of her. She looked into his eyes, and owned him instantly, eternally. He kissed the nearest thing to him, her knee.

“I love you.” He whispered.

“Obviously.” She beamed. She leaned downwards and kissed him firmly.

Her tongue ran across his bottom lip, and he couldn't believe he had fretted over this for days. She had forgiven him so easily and so completely, he couldn't believe it. He should never have expected anything else. It was Lily, after all. She got angry at him,  _a lot,_ but she always forgave him.

She was brilliant. She was everything. He smiled against her lips, trailing his fingers across her thigh, to the hem of her skirt. Her legs parted slightly, and he drew small circles on her thigh, tasting her tongue with his.

She sat back suddenly, watching him through her long eyelashes. He pushed between her legs slightly, and reached for the hem of her t-shirt. She moved to let him pull it off, revealing a familiar lacy bra. He recognised it instantly, it was his favourite. He quirked one eyebrow, and colour flooded her cheeks.

“I've missed you too.” She explained. When he grinned, she added, “Shut up.”

He pulled his own t-shirt over his head, and Lily ran her fingers through his hair to neaten it. He leaned upwards and found her collarbones with his lips. She sighed, and James ran his hands over her soft skin, dragging her closer. Her fingers stilled briefly in his hair, as he placed kisses down her chest.

She arched her back and he fumbled with the clasp of her bra. He pulled it off, and threw it somewhere behind him. He kissed the warm skin of her breast, wrapping his mouth around her pink nipple. She moaned softly, barely audible. He dragged his teeth across the sensitive skin, and she gasped, hands clenching in his hair.

He loved her. He loved her more than anything. He wanted to show her how much he loved her. He kissed below her breast, kissing her ribs. He ran his tongue over her hip bone, and her hips arched slightly. He moved away just enough to pull her skirt off.

James moved back and crashed their lips together. She nibbled his bottom lip, eliciting a moan. He needed her so badly. Days spent without her were bad enough, but it had been over a week since he'd last seen her. He had missed her so much. He had missed the smell of her hair, the taste of her skin, her laugh.

He kissed the inside of her thigh, and removed her underwear. She was already sounding breathless, and he knew just what to do. He kissed the highest part of her thigh, and moved across to the other. His eyes flicked up to her face, and she was blushing so prettily. He purposefully kissed the space above the sprinkling of pubic hair.

He moved to place his lips over the sweet-spot that would make her moan, but her voice stopped him, “Sirius.”

He pulled his face away quickly, and stared at her, mouth hanging open. He had certainly not expected that. He opened his mouth to ask why she had said  _his_ name and not James, but nothing came out. Her lips twitched, and she moved slowly, sitting up. She reached for his face, and ran her fingers down his cheek, so gently.

“I'm not thinking of Sirius, you can stop looking panicked.” She breathed, “I meant, Sirius, or Remus, or Peter, they're not going to...” Her eyes flicked purposefully towards the door.

“Oh,  _oh._ ” He said, he reluctantly stood up. If he was honest, this wouldn't the first time one of his friends had walked in on them. Still, he didn't want a repeat of that. He grabbed his wand from where it had fallen from his pocket and aimed it at the lock, “Colloportus.”

He turned back and she nodded her head. The rain was still pattering against the window, and the candlelight was spinning gold into her hair. He was back between her legs in an instant, nibbling her inner thigh. He ran his tongue over the reddening skin. He bit the skin, released it, then kissed it again. He kept going, feeling Lily's hips twitch with every bite.

He couldn't wait any longer, he wanted to taste her. He kissed the hood of her clitoris. Sucking it softy, then licking her broadly with his tongue. Lily moaned his name, and he felt a twitch in his pants. The floor was digging into his knees, but the sound of Lily's moaning was enough to make him stay where he was.

He pushed one finger inside her, feeling it grow slick. He arched it expertly, applying pressure to the roof of her vagina. He licked upwards, and flicked his tongue against her clitoris again. Lily arched her back, and he knew she was already so close. It was easy, really, he knew just what to do to make her come.

He loved the taste of her. He could hear her breath quickening when he paid attention to all the right places. He slipped in a second finger, feeling her muscles clamp down on them. He didn't care about his friends, he didn't care about anything but her right now. She was everything in his world, she was all that mattered, he was going to make her come.

“I love you.” She said again, her voice shaky and breathy.

He didn't reply but he smiled against her. He sped up his fingers, matching his pace with the movement of his tongue. She was warm and close. Her fingers were in his hair, pulling on the roots. Suddenly, her legs tightened around his shoulders and her orgasm rushed out of her. Her muscles contracted rapidly, and she arched her back. Her nails dug into his scalp as she fell into bliss.

He didn't stop. He kept going, he licked up the wetness that came out of her. He squeezed her thigh with his free hand, probably leaving bruises where his fingers were. He kissed every inch of her, sucking at her clitoris again. He licked until her hands tightened in his hair, and she pulled him away.

“Stop, it's... sensitive, I... Oh... god...” She panted, unable to form words. She let her eyes close.

He smiled triumphantly, and licked his fingers clean, while she caught her breath. He didn't move from between her legs, he moved upwards and rested his head on her chest. He could hear her erratic heartbeat, feel the fast rise and fall of her chest, he smiled. He never wanted to let her go. Never, ever, ever.

He felt her come back, her breathing return to normal. She wrapped her arms around him, enveloping him in the smell of her. After a few seconds of silence, where they listened to each other breathe, Lily said, “My mum thinks I've gone to the shop.”

“Don't leave.” James replied, wiggling free of her grasp.

He stumbled to his feet, and she draped herself horizontally across the couch. He couldn't drag his eyes away from her. He lifted her legs and sat down, resting them in his lap. He drew patterns along her smooth thighs, feeling happier than ever.

“I'll have to eventually. I can't go back home without milk, and naked.” She let out a melodic laugh, and he smiled fondly.

“You can take Sirius's milk.” He glanced around the room, “And I'll find your clothes... eventually.”

She grinned and reached for his hand. He entwined their fingers, and she pulled him down with surprising strength. He wrapped around her, and she nuzzled inside his arms. She sighed when he pressed his lips to her shoulder.

She wiggled her hips, rubbing against his crotch, “It feels like we're not done here... I guess I can stay for a bit longer.”

He let out a deep laugh, and nuzzled his face into her neck. After placing a kiss below her ear, he asked, “Forever?”

“Forever.” Lily agreed, and he could hear the smile in her voice.

 


	15. The Sex Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter gets the sex talk, Sirius loses his temper, the boys show some house pride, and Peter gets the sex talk (again)

**Sirius**

 

Sirius pulled his head away from James's bedroom door, “I can't hear anything.”

“Maybe she killed him.” Remus offered.

“Maybe she fucked him.”

“Why would she do that?” Peter asked.

Remus and Sirius shared a look. Sirius rolled his eyes and glanced at Peter, “Do we have to give you sex talk again, Petie?”

“No! Stop trying to give me the sex talk!” Peter snapped, throwing his arms out in anger. Remus snickered and Peter glared at them both, “I mean, she seemed mad when she arrived, why would she have sex with him if she's mad at him?”

“Break up sex.” Sirius said.

“Make up sex.” Remus added.

“Angry sex.”

“Apology sex.”

“I missed you sex.”

“Sex for the sake of it sex.”

“I get it.” Peter cut them off, scowling. He glanced at the door, “Should we go in?”

Sirius reached for the handle. He hesitated before he actually touched it, withdrawing his arm. He shook his head, “No, I've seen Prongs's bare arse too many times for my liking.”

He shuddered and headed back to the kitchen, taking a seat next to his half-eaten omelette.

Remus and Peter did the same and they ate in silence for a while. Sirius stretched and pushed his empty plate away, “Moony, Wormtail, we're one man down, but we can still leave a million and one curses for my beloved family.”

Sirius grimaced, they would be coming home soon. He wasn't sure what day they were coming home, but soon this week of fun would end, and he'd have another month with his family, before the start of Hogwarts.

He'd have to get Remus to teach him some more defensive spells before he left, Sirius couldn't allow his mother to knock him out every day. He glanced at the kitchen, still trashed and ruined from the duel on their first day. He would need to cover himself in protective charms just to leave his bedroom. There was a high chance he'd be murdered.

Not that there wasn't always a chance of him being murdered. A Gryffindor kid, with a half-blood werewolf boyfriend, in a family of bigoted Slytherins was begging to be tortured. He was surprised he'd made it this far really.

This week had been like a dream, like a safe haven in a sea of horror. He didn't want it to end. He dreaded the end, and the suffocating loneliness that would replace it. He wasn't allowed to send letters to his friends – he couldn't, because his parents hated contact with the outside world – and he was hardly ever allowed out to see them. The mirror was his only contact with James, he didn't know how he'd survive a month without seeing Moony.

He'd just started having sex with him, he wasn't ready to stop.

“Sirius? Hello? Earth to Padfoot?” Remus sang, waving his hand in front of his face.

Sirius snapped out of his thoughts. Both Peter and Remus were looking at him expectantly, he shook his head slightly, “What?”

Remus smiled, “I said, where should we start?”

Sirius smiled at him, and stood up. He told them to leave their dirty dishes where they were, and lead them up to the second floor. The floors above held bedrooms, but ones that were never used. He pointed at the door with the letters R.A.B. engraved on it.

“Regulus.” Sirius said, waiting for Remus or Peter to enter first.

Sirius had mixed feelings for Regulus. They had been best friends before Sirius went off to Hogwarts. His parents had always been a little harsh to him. Sirius would never be who they wanted him to be, and they knew it. But Reg had liked him. Reg had brought food up to him when Sirius had been grounded. Sirius had put plasters on his cut knees, and helped him climb the neighbour's fence.

But Regulus had been brainwashed. He eventually saw Sirius for the disappointment his parents knew he was. He'd stopped bringing him food, or telling him about his day. He barely looked at Sirius when they passed in the hallway. He'd stopped caring when his mother cursed him, he barely blinked an eye. Sirius missed the old Regulus.

He followed Remus and Peter in, feeling slightly hollow in his chest. Remus titled his head when he walked in. He lowered his wand, “Are you okay?”

Sirius glanced around the room. It was like Sirius's, only instead of Gryffindor posters and scarves, it was Slytherin. The words “Slytherin Pride” were carved into the wall, Sirius ran his finger along the deep gouge of the 'S'. It must have taken him hours, maybe days to do this magicless.

There were pictures of Reg and his friends on the desk.

Sirius picked one up, oblivious to the concerned looks Peter and Remus were throwing at him. He ignored the other Slytherins, and watched Regulus in the photo. He had his arms around the people next to him, and he looked like he thought taking pictures was stupid. There was a ghost of a smile on his face though. It was the happiest Sirius had seen him in a long time.

Sirius felt a gnawing feeling in his stomach. Was he really angry at Regulus? It wasn't his fault his parents were bigoted, and terrifying. Reg had grown up with Walburga and Orion too, he knew how they treated people like Sirius. He had only saved himself, and ensured his placement in Slytherin.

Sirius couldn't blame him.

He went to place the picture down on his desk, but froze. Where the picture had stood, was a tiny piece of paper. It would have been hidden behind the frame. Sirius picked it up with shaking fingers. He looked at it, it was a photo, ripped at the edges as though Regulus had torn it from a larger photo.

It was of Sirius and Regulus. Judging by the length of Sirius's hair and his pudgy cheeks, he was maybe ten. Regulus was smiling up at his big brother lovingly, and Sirius was ruffling his hair rather roughly, smiling too. There was a hand on Sirius's shoulder, attached to an arm that disappeared at the edge of the photo. Regulus had ripped it away. He'd ripped off their parents.

Sirius felt sick.

He placed both photos back down, hiding the one of himself and stepped away. He bolted for the door. Remus and Peter ran after him, catching him in the hallway, clutching the wall and breathing heavily.

“Sirius?” Remus whispered.

“He's... I can't do it.” Sirius said. Tears had blurred his vision slightly, but he refused to let them fall out. He would not cry over his brother. They weren't friends anymore. They were just strangers who lived in the same home.

Sirius didn't hate him though.

How could he?

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Remus reach out a hand but drop it before they touched. He leaned against the bannister instead, “It's okay.”

“He had a picture of me.” Sirius whispered to the wall. Moony walked over and pulled him upwards, hooking an arm over his shoulders to hold him.

Peter looked down at the ground nervously, “Why?”

“I don't know.” Sirius admitted. He couldn't leave hexes for Regulus.

He didn't deserve them. He was just another kid in a messed up family. Sirius wouldn't make it worse for him. A flame sparked in his belly. He would make his parents pay though. Regulus and Sirius could have been best friends, they could have been partners in crime. Regulus could have been an honourary Marauder, and Sirius could have handed the torch down to him when he graduated.

But that had been stolen from him. Regulus had been stolen from him, like his innocence, his safety in his own home, his self worth. All of it had been taken from him, by his parents. He shook away from Moony, pretending he didn't see the hurt look cross his face. He marched towards the double doors at the end of the hallway.

He was furious. He was a hot ball of rage, and he would make them pay. He threw open their doors, the bang echoed around the hallway. Pictures of them and Regulus were on the walls, and he'd been cut out of every single one. The bed was green and silver, the walls were black. There were expensive looking ornaments on the bedside table.

He reached for them first. He forgot that he could use magic, he was too consumed by anger.

He threw the ornamental vase to the ground, smashing it to pieces. He snapped quills, and poured ink on the floor, threw ornaments at the wall. He threw a woman's shoe at the mirror, shattering it. He ripped the portraits of his family to shreds, letting them fall like filthy snow. This was for himself, for Regulus, for every single person who had been burnt from the tapestry.

He stopped, shoulders heaving as he breathed. He looked at the remnants of his parent's possessions on the floor. He was stood on broken glass, torn pages from books, ripped portraits. There was nothing more he could destroy. It looked like a tornado had blown in, but he didn't feel satisfied. They were magical, they could fix everything in this room.

He wouldn't be able to fix himself though. He was broken. They had broken him.

Someone cleared their throat behind him. He spun around to see the shocked faces of Peter, James, and Remus stood in the doorway. Sirius ran a hand through his hair. They could see the cracks in his skin now too. They knew how screwed up he was.

James was the first to speak, “Wow.” He let out a long whistle, “That was....” Sirius froze,  _insane, crazy, utterly mad, weird_ .

“...incredible.” James finished.

Sirius pulled a face at him. It wasn't incredible. He had lost it. He looked at the destruction he had caused, knowing it was hardly a dent on the destruction they had caused in him. He wanted to cry, he wanted to lie on the floor, he wanted to... he didn't know what he wanted. He wanted to not feel broken. He wanted to wake up knowing he was safe. He wanted his brother to be his friend again.

Remus spoke then, “Did you forget we have magic? Or did you want to vent your anger first?”

Sirius looked at him silently for a long time. Remus was broken too. Only his cracks were in the shape of a werewolf, not a twisted family portrait. Sirius wasn't alone.

“You could confringo their bed.” Peter offered.

“Expulso the wardrobe.” James grinned.

Sirius stared at them in confusion. Why were they giving him ideas? Why weren't they disowning him and telling him he was too weird for them?

“Write the words Gryffindor Pride on the walls.” Remus offered.

“No, I've got it!” James said. He pushed out between Remus and Peter and approached Sirius. He nudged Sirius's shoulder, and ducked his head to meet his eyes, “Colour change their bed. Red and gold would really brighten up this room.”

Sirius looked at him. He whispered, so only James could hear, “Are you not disgusted by me?”

James drew his eyebrows together for a moment. Then realisation flashed across his face, followed quickly by affectionate amusement, “No. I'm really proud of you, actually.”

Sirius smiled slightly, and then shoved James away, “All right, don't get soppy on me.”

James laughed and Sirius grinned at his friends. He was an idiot. He had befriended amazing people, who would love him no matter what. No matter how broken he was.

They were nothing like his parents. 

Sirius aimed his wand at the bed, and the duvet changed from green to red. The silver and green striped pillows became red and gold. He saw Remus's wand lift up, and a lion appeared on each pillow. James lifted his wand too, and the walls were suddenly striped red and gold. Peter was etching the word “Gryffindor” into the wall over and over again.

They were laughing, grinning stupidly at their act of revenge. Sirius would be murdered for this, but he didn't care. The look on his friends's faces were worth it. When they were done, they laughed and admired their work.

“Gryf-fin-dor, Gryf-fin-dor, Gryf-fin-dor.” James started chanting.

Peter joined in, then Remus, then Sirius, until they were all chanting loudly, their voices echoing around the house. Sirius chanted the loudest, his throat aching from his shouting. He felt free. He felt his anger and his hurt and his pain leave his body with every chant.

“Wait, wait, wait. Okay I have to stop, I'm dying.” Remus said after they'd been chanting for what felt like forever. He clutched his stomach.

Sirius remembered how close the full moon was, and was at his side in seconds. Sirius brushed Remus's hair off his forehead.

James cleared his throat, “So, I take it you two are, um, you know...”

Sirius and Remus looked away from each other and stared at James, as though remembering he was still there.

“What?” They asked together.

“I'm okay with you two, doing... this...” He waved his hand between the two of them, and Peter drew his eyebrows together, “but just... ah... not when we're all sharing a dorm, okay?”

Remus and Sirius shared a look again, and James elaborated, “I heard you.”

Sirius scoffed, “So you like to listen, is that it?”

James pulled a face, “No. I don't need to hear you two doing whatever.” 

“Wait, are you gay?” Peter asked, staring in shock at Sirius.

“Fuck Wormtail, get with the times. I've been bi for at least seventy-two hours now.” Sirius laughed.

“Yeah Wormy, where have you been?” James laughed, he turned back to Sirius and Remus and narrowed his eyes, “But seriously, no boning in the dorm.”

“Boning?” Peter asked, looking horrified.

Remus laughed, and glanced at Sirius, “I think it's time for the sex talk again.”

“Right, Petie, when a boy loves a boy, they usually end up-” 

“NO! La, la, la, la, la,” Peter shouted, sticking his fingers in his ears.

The three of them laughed at Peter's reaction, and James pulled his fingers from his ears forcefully. He wrapped an arm around his shoulder, “You don't want the sex talk from Sirius, you want it from me. See, Pete, sex is a lot like Quidditch. One person is the goal, and the other is the chaser. The aim of the game is to get the ball in the hole.”

“The aim is most certainly not to get the ball in the hole.” Remus interjected.

“Yeah Prongs, do  _you_ need the sex talk?” Sirius asked, arching one eyebrow, “The ball doesn't go in the hole, the broomstick does.”

“Yeah, but that's bad Quidditch.” James pointed out.

“We don't want Pete trying to stick his ball in some girl's hole for the first time.” Sirius said. 

“You guys are the worst!” Peter whined, pushing James away. They laughed again and Peter glared at them.

Sirius took Remus's hand, there was no point hiding it now. A tiny bit of colour bloomed in Remus's cheeks, and he wanted to kiss it away. Only, he was sure James would go mad at him, so he resisted – as hard as it was to resist that face.

Remus smiled at him, and then groaned in pain, “Damn full moon.”

Sirius gave his hand a reassuring squeeze.

“Speaking of sex.” Sirius said, leading Remus out of the room. James and Peter followed, “What happened with you and Evans?”

“A gentleman never kisses and tells.” James answered.

“But a friend shares everything.” Sirius countered, looking over his shoulder at James.

James rolled his eyes, spinning his wand between his fingers expertly, “I'm not asking for details about your sex life.”

“I'd give them to you though.” Sirius said, “Remus likes to talk d-”

“No you won't!” Remus interrupted, giving Sirius a stern look. Sirius grinned back innocently, and James rolled his eyes.

“Did you do it doggy style?” Peter interjected. They all froze in the middle of the stairs, and stared at Peter in shock. He shrugged, “I don't need the sex talk.”

After a few more seconds of confused staring, they all started laughing again. 


	16. Animal Wars Part II: Moony's Triumph

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus is in pain, Sirius and James fight again, Peter hides under a cabinet.

**Remus**

 

The remainder of Thursday, and all of Friday, whizzed by in a blur of eating and sleeping; laughter and firewhiskey; Sirius's eager, wandering lips, and James's annoyed grunts. Remus's body had slowly gotten more prickly with pain, and now he was sat cross-legged on the dusty floor, muscles tensed and aching. There was a rather large, rather needy black dog in his lap, pawing at his hand and whining every time he stopped stroking his head.

“You're so pathetic, Padfoot.” James shook his head at the dog, a small smile curving his mouth. He spun his wand through his fingers. Sirius barked at him, and James smiled a bit more, “You know you have to be human to respond. I don't speak puppy.”

The dog whined and pawed at Remus's knee, and Remus rolled his eyes. He could feel the moon rising, there wasn't much time left. He shut his eyes. Sirius barked again and pawed harder at his knee, making the joint protest in pain.

Remus patted Sirius's head tiredly, “Okay, okay.” He looked up at James, “Prongs, Sirius would like me to tell you, he doesn't speak arrogant tosser.”

James stuck his middle finger up at Sirius, and Sirius let out a bark which sounded remarkably like a laugh. Remus stopped twisting Sirius's fur through his fingers, and rubbed his temples. James and Peter jumped to their feet. Peter looked out the window, and held his thumb up into his line of sight.

After a second, he said, “Five minutes.”

James clapped his hands together, “Get up, Moons.”

Remus groaned, and Sirius stood up. He jumped over to Remus's face and licked him until Remus shoved him away, and dragged himself to his feet.

Remus wiped his face and glared at the dog, happily wagging his tail, “I hate you.”

The dog barked and bounded towards James. Sirius stopped a few steps away from him, and growled, his body arching over. James pointed his wand at him, “You won't win, pup, I'm bringing my A-game.”

“No animal wars.” Remus groaned, wrapping his fingers around an expensive looking sconce to hold himself up. He kicked the empty bottle of wolfsbane away from him. The four of them were in an abandoned, very dusty bedroom on the fourth floor, ready for his transformation.

The dog whined, so did James, “Moony, come on, it'll be fun.”

“Yeah Remus, you always win anyway.” Peter chimed in.

He looked back at the window, but Remus didn't need to hear what he was about to say. A shiver ran down his spine, followed by hell-fire. He clenched his teeth so hard, he was sure he'd grind them to dust. Through his eyes, blurred with tears, he saw James and Peter transform.

********

**Peter**

 

Everything was suddenly much bigger than it had been. Peter scurried across the floor, trying to find some high ground. He'd been trampled once before, and he wasn't about to let it happen again. He ran through Sirius's legs, and the dog pawed after him amicably. Peter dodged what felt like a hundred hooves when James walked towards Remus.

Eventually, Peter made it to the bed, and used his tiny claws to clamber up the sheet.

Breathing quickly, feeling his tiny heart beat fast, he reminded himself to transform on the bed next time.

By the time he was at the top, Remus had fully transformed, and was looking at the stag with interest. All three of Peter's friends were completely unrecognisable, but there was something about the way they stood and held themselves, which would tell even a stranger that they weren't normal animals.

Sirius was bounding about, not sure who to look at, and wagging his tail excitedly. Peter wiped his paws over his face, and the stag swung his head to face the dog. Remus made a move to step between them, probably trying to stop the impending Animal Wars, but ended up dragging his claws across the wall, and knocking several photo frames to the floor instead.

By the time Remus had registered what he'd done, Padfoot had launched himself at Prongs, and sunk his teeth into his leg. Prongs stumbled back, let out a weird hissing noise, and shook the dog off. He lowered his antlers towards the dog and charged, catching him in the side.

Peter hopped across the bed to keep watch, he was supposed to be the point-counter and referee since he was too small to fight. He'd discovered that telling one of three grumpy boys that they hadn't won, was more dangerous than fighting any of them.

Remus got involved suddenly, prying James away from Sirius, and howling furiously until they both stopped. Peter was sure he saw Sirius's tail tuck between his legs. To be fair, whenever Remus howled, it was terrifying. It was like living in a nightmare. Peter would never get used to werewolf-Remus. He was pretty much the same person, and James and Sirius were way more violent than he ever was, but still... it was just the way he looked. So large and imposing, with such evil eyes.

Peter would never admit it, but he'd definitely had nightmares about The Wolf. Nightmares so bad, he couldn't bring himself to meet Remus's eyes for days. Peter gave a squeak to distract himself, and his three friends made their way to the door. Sirius paused near the bed to let Peter climb onto his shoulders. Peter did, and settled on Sirius's withers.

From here, he could see Remus and James stood by the closed door. After a few more seconds of all four of them waiting patiently, Moony burst forward and the door gave way easily, as though it had been held up by nothing more than blu-tack.

Sirius gave an appreciative bark, and Prongs stomped his hoof. He lead the way out of the room, his antlers leaving deep scratches in the wall. Moony followed, walking in that horrifying, stumbling way werewolves do.

Sirius, with Peter on his back, followed jovially, knocking over end tables carrying vases and frames as went. He barked and wagged his tail, almost throwing Peter off in his excitement. He was so happy to be trashing his house, he could hardly contain himself.

The four of them turned into a random room, and Sirius ran forward. Peter anticipated what was coming, and leapt off. He landed and rolled to his feet, just in time to see Sirius snap his jaws at James's antlers.

Moony howled again, and Peter made a run for it. They were going to fight properly now, Moony was pissed off. Peter found a cabinet, and skidded under. He crawled to the edge, peeking out, and watched his friends fight.

At one point, Sirius was flung into the cabinet, almost crushing it, but he limped back to his feet, and growled at his... boyfriend? Was boyfriend the word? Peter wasn't sure. He didn't have much time to ponder this before, Moony smacked an extremely heavy arm out at the stag.

Peter struggled to remember the points, but by the time the sky began to lighten, he was sure Moony was in the lead, as always. The sun rose slowly, casting a hazy orange glow around the trashed room they were in. It looked a little like the shack, with a broken sofa and peeling paint. The Wolf froze, eyeing the window fearfully, and he began to contort again.

Wormtail crawled out from under the cabinet, and transformed. He was still always mildly confused when his clothes were still on in human form, but he was glad they were. Remus was looking decidedly weaker and much more human. Unlike the other three, Moony never ended up in clothes after his transformation.

He wasn't embarrassed about it though, they'd all seen him naked more times than they could count. Sirius was now human too, and James was transforming. Sirius scooped a now-unconscious Remus into his arms, wavering slightly at the weight in his injured arm. James tossed the comforter from the sofa over Moony.

The four of them, silent and out of breath, left the room. Sirius carried Moony, James poked tentatively at a fresh cut on his arm, and Peter recounted the events of the night, which lead to Moony's triumph. As they walked the same hallway they had last night, Peter took in just how much destruction they had caused. It had been hard to tell with his rat-eyes, but now he could see the floor was scratched like the walls. Glass and ornamental porcelain was littered across the floor.

Peter had seen more smashed porcelain in one week than he had in his entire life. James nudged him gently in the arm, and smiled. Dark rings lined his eyes, but he seemed happy enough. Peter was just as tired, and in need of food, but he always felt a sense of closeness and camaraderie after the full moon. Moony gave a gentle sigh in Sirius's arms, and Sirius shifted him slightly as he walked downstairs. 

 


	17. The Destruction of Sirius Black

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An unwelcome return greets Sirius and Remus.

**Sirius**

 

It was bright when Sirius opened his eyes. The world had been drained of colour, bleached. He blinked a few times, and grasped around for his wand. He located it and shut the curtains furiously. Slowly his vision came back. He stretched his arms high above his head, hearing his aching joints pop loudly. A groan slipped from his lips. He was still his jeans from yesterday, but he had yanked his t-shirt off in his sleep.

Sirius let his wand roll from his fingers. He'd miss having magic once the trace returned. James had said it would return today at midday. Sirius realised he didn't even know what time it was. The trace could already be back, any second now the Ministry would send him a letter warning him about his use of under-age magic.

Sirius was too tired to care. Besides, even the Ministry couldn't get an owl to 12 Grimmauld Place.

He nuzzled into his blanket, it smelt like peppermint, like Remus. Another tentative knock sounded from the door.

_Oh yeah._ Sirius thought, remembering what had woken him up in the first place.

“Come in.” Sirius called, his voice hoarse from all his barking.

The handle bent down and the door was pushed open slowly. Fear suddenly clutched Sirius's chest, he half sat up, feeling his shoulders tense up. It could be his mother. He didn't know when she was coming back, but it had been almost a week since she'd left...

This could be her.

This could be her coming to punish him, having found his Gryffindor friends downstairs. Oh Merlin. Were they okay? James and Peter were likely asleep, would they have woken up? Would either of them have gotten to Moony in time? He was always so hard to wake after the full moon, Sirius's mother could have easily caught him.

He let out an audible breath, not realising he had held it in, when Remus's face poked into his room, looking wan. He gave what was probably supposed to be a smile, but actually ended up looking more like a grimace. Sirius lay back down with relief, it wasn't his mother. It was his adorable, tired looking boyfriend.

“Moonbeam.” Sirius whispered, his voice carrying easily in the silent room.

“I feel like shit.” Remus whispered back, his voice raw and croaky from all his howling. He stepped into the room and leaned back on the door, clicking it closed. He seemed exhausted and wounded, but he wasn't baring any clear cuts from Animal Wars.

Sirius, on the other hand, had a large darkening bruise on his shoulder, from when he was thrown into the cabinet, and various scratches from both Moony's claws and Prongs's antlers.

Sirius grinned at the memory, and opened his arms to Remus, “Come here to daddy Padfoot.”

“Ew.” Remus said, sounding small and weak.

“Come on.” Sirius gestured for Remus to settle into his arms. It would be mutually beneficial for them to cuddle right now. They were both injured, cuddling would help fix them both. Sirius craved the feeling of Remus resting against him. He waved his hands again when Remus didn't move.

“Only if you promise to  _never_ call yourself that again,  _ever._ ” Remus said.

“Fine, come on.” Sirius was happy to see Remus move away from the door.

He fit into Sirius's arms easily, and Sirius covered him with the blanket, nuzzling his face into his shoulder. It wasn't the comfiest of positions, their legs were tangled and Sirius's arm was already turning numb, but he was fine. He was perfectly content to lie here for the remainder of the day, of the week, of his life.

He fell asleep almost instantly, surrounded by the sound of Remus's breathing and the smell of peppermint on his skin.

********

**Remus**

 

Sirius was a deep sleeper. This, Remus knew. There had been many nights when the other Marauders had had to literally drag Sirius from his bed, to wake him up for pranking. When there was a storm, he would refuse to sleep alone. But once he'd found someone's bed to share, usually Remus's, he would sleep uninterrupted for the rest of the night.

Today was no different. Remus breathed into his hair, and Sirius slept peacefully. Remus was aching and suffering, but Sirius's arms were making him feel better. Sirius's sleepy mumbling, his occasional snores, and his heartbeat were enough to lull Remus into sleep.

Remus was a light sleeper. He was reminded of this, when Sirius's bedroom door was flung open with a bang.

Remus shot up, jolting Sirius out of his sleep. He let out a disgruntled moan, which immediately died in his throat. His eyes held a child-like fear Remus had never seen before. Remus followed his gaze. In the doorway, stood an imposing woman with fire in her eyes. Remus felt fear crawl up his throat, adrenaline thrummed through his body and his first thought was of his wand. He knew exactly where it was.

Downstairs, on his suitcase.

_Fuck._

The woman – Sirius's mother, Remus guessed – screamed something incomprehensible, of which Remus only caught the words  _“blood traitors”, “scum”,_ and chillingly,  _“murder”._ Remus instinctively moved in front of Sirius, and Sirius's fingernails cut into his skin.

The woman continued her screaming, Remus imagined the whole house shaking. There was a flash of light, and suddenly everything was gone. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *cackles menacingly*
> 
> p.s. this is the second to last chapter. Next week I will upload the final chapter.


	18. Homecoming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus must remember. He must. 
> 
> But remember what?

**Remus**

 

The sky was grey and clear, like Sirius's eyes. The sun was gone, hiding. Remus felt numb, confused, lost. His thoughts were short, disjointed.

He rolled to his left, trying to make sense of everything. His eyes fell on James and Peter, sprawled across the path, like himself. Remus's head and stomach rolled together, and he pushed himself to his feet. His knees were weak beneath him and his body begged him to lie back down.

Three suitcases were open on the street, their belongings strewn across the road. It was like an explosion had gone off inside them, and inside Remus's head. Everything spun sickeningly, there was a rhythmic pounding which might have been Remus's heart, and a voice in his head told him he had to hurry.

But hurry for what, he couldn't remember.

He bent over and retrieved his wand, immediately regretting it when his stomach threatened to empty itself. His wand... There was something he had to remember about his wand... Remus squeezed his eyes shut and rubbed his temples, he needed to remember. If it was so important, how could he forget?

Why was he outside? What the fuck was going on?

“What?” James complained. He grunted and rolled over.

He looked pallid, and his nose was bleeding. The blood stood out starkly against his skin, and Remus felt like he could taste the iron tang of it. He reached a finger up to his lips, and met a warm liquid. His nose was bleeding too. So was Peter's.

Why was he outside? Remus needed to know. It was so important. His nose was bleeding, his head was spinning, he was going to throw up. All four of them were...

No...

Not four. There was only three of them.

It came crashing down on him so hard it nearly knocked him to the ground.

Sirius.

Remus staggered in a half-circle and launched himself at the large oak door of 12 Grimmauld Place. He hit the wood and a throb spread through his head, he ignored it, banging his fists against the door over and over again. He yanked on the handle, and snatched his hand away instantly. His palm was turning red, the handle had burned him.

“SIRIUS!” Remus screamed, tearing his already sore throat to pieces. He shoved his shoulder into the door violently. He was consumed with fear. The woman,  _that woman,_ was going to kill him. Sirius was going to die.

“SIRIUS! Sirius!” Remus shouted as though it would help, as though the door would open if he was loud enough.

Two strong arms wrapped around him, dragging him away from the door. He kicked out, ignoring the blood steadily dripping into his mouth, and the tears falling from his eyes. He needed to get to Sirius. The house was trashed, his mum had found not one but  _four_ Gryffindors in her house, and one had been in bed with her son. Sirius was going to be murdered, and it would be Remus's fault.

“MOONY! MOONY! For fuck's sakes stop kicking me and tell me what's going on!” James shouted, squeezing Remus's body until he could hardly breathe. Remus choked and coughed. James released his arms just long enough for Remus to speak.

“His mum's back.” Was all Remus got to say before James had launched himself at the door like Remus had.

Peter was stood up, and he staggered to the door too. All three of them banged on the unyielding door, calling for Sirius, begging for his safety. Remus smacked his fist into the door, cutting his knuckles, and suddenly he was launched backwards.

He landed with a crack, felt white-hot pain rush into his hand, and the breath leave his lungs in one go. The sky spun and blurred out of focus. A shadow passed over Remus, someone was crouching next to him, but he couldn't find any energy in his body to move. He lay there, waiting for his sight to return.

Remus had never been so relieved in his life, as he was when Sirius's ashen face came into focus. Despite the pain spreading like acid through his body, Remus forced himself up and wrapped his arms tightly around Sirius's neck. Tears were flowing freely down his face and he couldn't tell if they were for his own pain, or for Sirius's.

Sirius gripped him roughly, like Remus was the only stable structure in a hurricane. He tipped forward, throwing out one hand to hold both himself and Remus up. The ground was cold and jagged on Remus's legs, but there was no way Remus was letting go of Sirius long enough to stand.

Sirius buried his face in his shoulder, and Remus could feel wetness come through his t-shirt. He wanted to hug the pain away, he wanted to hold Sirius until he stopped crying, until he couldn't remember anything other than the warmth of Remus's arms. James and Peter appeared then, wrapping around them both protectively.

After what felt like forever, where the only sound was their jagged breathing, Sirius whispered, “They kicked me out.”

Remus pulled away far enough to see Sirius's eyes, James and Peter moved too, still shielding Sirius from his childhood home. Remus brushed two rough thumbs across Sirius's cheeks, wiping the tears away. He never wanted to see Sirius cry again. He would personally take it upon himself to make sure it never happened again.

“Was it...” Remus couldn't form the words, but Sirius knew what he was going to say. Sirius knew he was blaming himself.

“No.” Sirius whispered, still clinging to Remus's shirt, “There were four Gryffindors in her desecrated house, which is exactly four too many for her.”

“What did she do?” James asked, in a voice that was as hard as stone. Remus clearly wasn't the only one who would protect Sirius with his life. James looked ready to set Grimmauld Place on fire, he looked ready to go into the nightmare house and personally murder everyone in it.

“She...” Sirius's voice failed while his mouth kept moving. His eyes had glazed over, and Remus dabbed at the fresh cut on his cheek with his palm. Sirius seemed to snap out of his thoughts, “She kicked me out.” They all knew that wasn't all she had done, but no one pressed him further, “She snapped my broom too.”

He stood up hastily, almost knocking Peter in the jaw with his shoulder. Remus clambered up too, ignoring his smarting body. Sirius glanced down the street in horror. He seemed wild, uncontrolled. More so than when he was ruining his parents's bedroom. Remus reached for him and he shook away.

“I'm homeless.” He said, eyes wide with fear and terror. “I have nowhere to go. I'm going to... Oh fuck, I'm going to die on the street like a, like a, what am I going to do?”

“Padfoot.” James said.

Sirius carried on as though he hadn't spoken, “I have nothing left. All of my stuff was in there. I don't have a family, or a house, or anything.”

“Padfoot!” James said again, this time louder.

“I'm homeless. I'm abandoned. I have nothing. I'm nothing. I have nowhere to go. I'm alone. I'm going to die without a family, I'm lost, I'm-”   
“PADFOOT!” James shouted, placing his hands on Sirius's shoulders and forcing him to look at him.

“What! Can't you see I'm freaking the fuck out here!” Sirius said, sounding closer to normal than he had a second ago.

“I know you love to be dramatic, so I'm going to let you finish, but I just wanted you to know, you can live at my house for the rest of your life if you want.” James said, sincerely, wiping his bloody nose on his arm, smearing a red stain across his skin.

“Really?” Sirius asked, looking taken aback. He stared at James's eyes searching for a lie, or a condition of some sort.

James released his shoulders, apparently convinced Sirius wasn't about to start freaking out again. He scratched his neck, frowning in pain, “Are you kidding? My parents love you more than they love me!”

“Mine too.” Remus chimed in. Sirius spun to face him, still looking amazed. As though he had been expecting them to leave him here alone, and bid their farewells.

“And mine.” Peter shrugged when Sirius looked at him too.

“Guys... I... Wow.” Sirius said, looking like he had just been given the best present of his life. Like all his dreams had come true in a few words, Remus wanted to swat him over the head.

“Did you really think we'd let you live on the street?” Remus asked.

Sirius looked slightly uncomfortable, “Well...”

“Idiot.” James said, dragging Sirius into a tight hug. He pulled away, chucked Sirius's chin with his knuckle, “A dog is for life, not just for Christmas.”

“Piss off.” Sirius smiled with his busted lips.

Remus ran over and hugged him again, James and Peter joined instantly, and they hugged for a long time. Remus was glad they were all alive, glad that the worst thing to come from this week was Sirius getting out of his abusive home with his life, glad that once his lips healed, Remus could kiss them all he wanted.

They pulled apart when they heard the door close.

Remus, James, and Peter, were all ready. They had all leapt in front of Sirius and aimed their wands. In front of the door stood a trunk, with the letters S.B. written on it. They lowered their wands, and Sirius peered over Remus's shoulders.

“Is that your trunk?” Peter whispered, as though the trunk could hear them.

“Is it a trick?” James whispered too.

Remus felt a nervous shiver go down his spine. This could be an elaborate trick, Remus didn't put it past them. Sirius pushed between James and Remus and stepped towards the trunk. Both of them grabbed his arms and held him still.

“Don't be insane.” James ordered.

Remus saw the curtain in the lounge waver. He aimed his wand at the window quickly, only to meet eyes with Sirius... No, Regulus.

Regulus watched him as though he was watching something as boring as a tree. For some reason, for no logical reason at all, in fact, Remus felt like Regulus had left the trunk there. He released Sirius's arm, maybe making a huge mistake, and stared at the trunk, “I think it's fine.”

“What?” James hissed.

“Regulus is at the window.” All of them turned to face the lounge window. The curtain dropped quickly and Regulus disappeared from sight. Sirius shook away from James's grasp, he walked to the trunk confidently and dragged it behind him back towards them.

“I trust him.” Sirius said simply.

James threw an anxious glance at Remus, and Remus shrugged in response. He walked to his own trunk, and threw his items back into it. He zipped it up hastily, eager to get away from this street, and reached out for Sirius's hand. Their fingers entwined, and it eased the furious pain in Remus's body slightly. James took up Sirius's other side, throwing a heavy arm around his shoulder, and Peter stood next to James.

Peter looked at his watch, “Five minutes past noon.”

The trace was officially back. They couldn't use magic to heal themselves, or to get themselves back home. They would have to walk, or limp, with their bloody noses and their busted lips.

“My house is this way.” James pointed with a sigh, and they set off.

Remus knew a walk to James's house would take forever, ninety minutes at least. He didn't mind though. He would walk for days if it meant Sirius would never have to return to Grimmauld Place.

“Gryf-fin-dor, Gryf-fin-dor, Gryf-fin-dor.” Sirius whispered. Remus felt his mouth curve into a smile.

James joined in, then Peter. Sirius looked at Remus, and Remus beamed at him. He joined in. The four of them chanted breathlessly and jaggedly, stumbling and staggering in the vague direction of James's house, feeling like the past week had lasted a lifetime. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh, so it's over and I am sad. I really enjoyed writing this long ago, and I'm so glad a lot of you liked it. I'm aware there were so minor plot holes (my bad). Thanks for your lovely comments and your kudos, I love you all so much.   
> Special thanks to faultyfox because your comments kept me posting, they were so incredibly nice.
> 
> I hoped you enjoyed the story.


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